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January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see my boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML

#20458512
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35525) - you deserved it (6401)

On 01/14/2013 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)

Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26889) - you deserved it (6384)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML

#20446049
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32106) - you deserved it (6356)

On 01/07/2013 at 10:40am - love - by gassy - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48222) - you deserved it (6321)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I came out to my parents. They laughed in my face. FML

#20445704
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (6313)

On 01/07/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by areyoukiddingme (woman) - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46038) - you deserved it (6306)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48803) - you deserved it (6254) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37168) - you deserved it (6196)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML

#20436663
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44212) - you deserved it (6194)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my son got his first tooth, and is enthusiastically biting everything. I breastfeed. FML

#20450046
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33062) - you deserved it (6146)

On 01/09/2013 at 1:48pm - kids - by loveyouson (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

#20447616
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28831) - you deserved it (6132)

On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, during dinner, my mum asked why I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was because my girlfriend had cheated on me. At some point during my venting, I asked why this stuff always seems to happen to me. My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." FML

#20442962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19409) - you deserved it (6103)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:04pm - misc - by moronforadad (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my girlfriend left for basic training. I went to say goodbye to her at the airport. Only after I walked back to my car did I realize that she still had the keys. My extra set was back at the house, locked in. FML

#20471606
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32596) - you deserved it (6023)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by blank - United States



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