Today, while reading in the bath, I accidentally switched the shower on. Not wanting my book to get soaked, I threw it out of the tub. When I got out of the tub later, I found it had landed squarely in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22312) - you deserved it (8203)
On 01/26/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by stelssy (woman) - United States
Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26180) - you deserved it (8142)
On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia
Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24043) - you deserved it (8110)
On 01/17/2013 at 5:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I discovered that if I turn my shower off for a minute, then back on again, the water comes out scalding hot. I discovered that while the showerhead was pointed directly at my genitals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23989) - you deserved it (7966)
On 01/01/2013 at 2:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, while reading an erotic story I was more excited that the author used a conjunctive adverb than the sexual content in the story. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20199) - you deserved it (7841)
On 01/13/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by frustrated - United States (Florida)
Today, I needed to get a hair cut, so my boyfriend recommended I see his mother, who is a trained and licensed hairdresser. Despite the fact that she hates me, I thought she would be mature and do it nice. She butchered my hair like a toddler does their Barbie, and insists that it "suits me". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24593) - you deserved it (7611)
On 01/23/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by parmetries - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out that my roommate has been switching my protein powder with chocolate milk mix and brown sugar. Since I work out frequently, I've been consuming large amounts of this and have gained at least 10 pounds of fat. His reason? I turned his bookbag inside out. Once. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25745) - you deserved it (7583)
On 01/29/2013 at 5:56pm - health - by fatty milkshakes - United States
Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28283) - you deserved it (7579)
On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)
Today, my loyalty and regularity at my local pizza place were noticed. The delivery guy, when bringing yet another order, asked me if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were living with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21499) - you deserved it (7534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/31/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by heallven - Sent from mobile version
Today, at my four-year-old daughter's insistence, I looked for - and found - a radio station that plays "Santa music" all year round. She's ecstatic and I can't turn it off without upsetting her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18167) - you deserved it (7149)
On 01/01/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by christmaswillneverend - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20826) - you deserved it (7104)
Today, my mom made up a new game. She thinks it's hilarious to hide my brother's creepy Batman toy around the house to creep me out. This has been going on for hours and I still scream every time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18433) - you deserved it (7095)
On 01/12/2013 at 1:36am - misc - by poohanne - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (7081)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 17 June 2013
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