Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14265) - you deserved it (2950)
On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33388) - you deserved it (2944)
On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30896) - you deserved it (2880)
On 12/29/2012 at 4:32am - misc - by gassy - United States (Washington)
Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32987) - you deserved it (2861)
On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my bra clasp broke in the middle of a job interview. I got the job on the spot. I'm scared to report into work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24293) - you deserved it (2850)
On 12/19/2012 at 5:06pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28000) - you deserved it (2846)
On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my fiancé called off our engagement after I contested his belief that women stop having periods after they are married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27023) - you deserved it (2840)
On 12/17/2012 at 7:29pm - love - by kidyounot (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while doing our Christmas shopping, my sister showed me a product that she really hated. The same one I bought her for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (2832)
On 12/17/2012 at 1:16pm - money - by bob (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24475) - you deserved it (2803)
On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)
Today, while my girlfriend was playing a game on my phone, an unknown number sent me a nude picture and the words "Miss you, baby." This person's mistake just cost me a black eye, and probably my relationship too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32205) - you deserved it (2794)
On 12/28/2012 at 12:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, while at the airport waiting for my flight, I sat down next to a mother and her son. As I pulled out a water bottle, she leaned over to her son and said, "Promise me you will never do what the man next to you just did." I have no idea what the hell I did wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30676) - you deserved it (2778)
Today, I went to bed with a bra on. I woke up with no bra on. My brother had a friend sleep over last night. I wonder where my bra went. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29938) - you deserved it (2762)
On 12/31/2012 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I noticed my wife put a bumper sticker on our car that says "Cowboy butts drive me nuts." I've driven that car to work every day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21631) - you deserved it (2744)
On 12/18/2012 at 4:44pm - misc - by idontevenlikebuttsthatmuch - United States (Arizona)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
