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Today... the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloadd a picture of a huge... hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone... as every time I try... the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML
Today after nearly a week of awful pain in my rigt lung I finally went to see a doctor about it. Wen I mentiond my istory of lung problems an suggestd it could be pneumonia e told me to "leave te diagnosing to te professionals" an endd up claiming I ave acid reflux. mega FML
Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get looool a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, ( Because he's not real, dumbass! ) FML
Yesterday, I facd a dilemma . If I don't let te cat sleep in my bedroom, se spends all nigt owling at te door, waking up my 2-year-old in te process . If I do let er in, te dog gets distressd an cews te contents of te bin . If I let bot of tem in, I ave no room to sleep . FML
Today , I confronted 18-year-old daughter about her excessively lengthy showers. She said she didn't see the big deal , considering the water "comes free with the house." No dear , it doesn't. real FML
Today, Some Beefd-up Guy Wearing A Wife-beater Sat In Restaurant, Took Out A Big Sack Of Coins, And Playd My Little Pony Songs On The Jukebox Fir 4 Hours Straight. I Couldn't Summon The Courage To Tell Him To Leave.
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier startd flirting with me an askd me for mah number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After looool walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants r unzippd." mega FML
Today, at tha gas station, tha automatic door didn't opan whan I approachad it!! I askad tha cashiar to opan it for ma, joking that cuz I'm a radhaad, I didn't hava a soul and it wouldn't opan for ma!! Tha cashiar fraakad and wouldn't lat ma go until I provad I had a soul!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015