Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML

#20398877
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29325) - you deserved it (1921)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

#20186150
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25202) - you deserved it (1917)

On 12/01/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a crowded bus when the woman behind me vomited. The guy next to her was a sympathy puker. So were 3 other people. There was no room to escape. FML

#20399062
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31000) - you deserved it (1904)

On 12/14/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by MiscHats (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29829) - you deserved it (1867)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21508) - you deserved it (1828)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28223) - you deserved it (1827)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML

#20187165
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24118) - you deserved it (1814)

On 12/01/2012 at 9:01pm - misc - by potheadloljk (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, after weeks of begging, I finally got an interview at my dream job. Turns out, they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML

Today, my roommate turned the thermostat down to 50 degrees. Why? Because she read that shivering burns calories. FML

#20200383
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (1809)

On 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26055) - you deserved it (1794)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML

#20186305
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21958) - you deserved it (1784)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States

Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML

#20189404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20211) - you deserved it (1783)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: