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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20277) - you deserved it (2964)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML

#20145433
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37453) - you deserved it (2961)

On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - intimacy - by heartbroke (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML

#20146254
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28590) - you deserved it (2946)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - love - by markderanjer (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25419) - you deserved it (2918)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

#20170390
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22027) - you deserved it (2915)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:03am - love - by Chris (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25684) - you deserved it (2915)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21154) - you deserved it (2909)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, on my way to school, I was shouted at by an obnoxious businessman for sitting down on the train when a "full fare paying passenger" was standing. I would normally have given him the seat straight away, except I have a broken leg. I showed him my leg and crutches. He still made me get up. FML

#20159990
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24871) - you deserved it (2893)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:50am - health - by myleghurts (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

#20164794
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25055) - you deserved it (2889)

On 11/15/2012 at 9:40pm - misc - by needanewride - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

#20175635
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17859) - you deserved it (2872)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20743) - you deserved it (2864)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

#20147554
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23724) - you deserved it (2803)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by i fking love docb - Virgin Islands, U.S.

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML

#20165046
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21035) - you deserved it (2790)

On 11/16/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by grocerystalker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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