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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML

#20145433
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27396) - you deserved it (1805)

On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - intimacy - by heartbroke (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I came home to find that my girlfriend had repainted my bedroom. As she had offered to do it, it shouldn't have been a problem. However, she decided to return the several unopened cans of off-white paint that I'd bought for something "more neutral." Like "Sunset Orange." FML

#20165039
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13479) - you deserved it (1783)

On 11/16/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by spaceforrent - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

#20179747
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16732) - you deserved it (1770)

On 11/26/2012 at 1:59pm - love - by Blake Lawrence - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out the can of spray paint I got at Walmart yesterday has no spray nozzle, rendering it useless. I'm working on a project that needs to be done by the weekend, so I get to go wait in a huge line and risk being trampled to death tonight just to exchange one damn spray paint can. FML

#20174445
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13990) - you deserved it (1767)

On 11/22/2012 at 9:56pm - misc - by Unfortunate Painter - United States (California)

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22234) - you deserved it (1754)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

#20161591
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19182) - you deserved it (1752)

On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML

#20176506
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17130) - you deserved it (1747)

On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML

#20166242
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15527) - you deserved it (1739)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)

Today, while giving a lecture on gender equality in the workplace, a woman yelled from the back, asking me why I'm not out starting a war somewhere. I stopped talking and tried to pinpoint her in the crowd, which she took as a sign to snort and call me a pussy. Nobody would back me up. FML

#20168119
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13065) - you deserved it (1731)

On 11/18/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18491) - you deserved it (1730)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29380) - you deserved it (1724)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, my parents told me that they had joined a local club. Proud of them for going out of their comfort zone to make new friends, I googled the name of the club. I'm sure they'll make some lifelong friends at their first swingers club meet. FML

#20179494
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17880) - you deserved it (1719)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20517) - you deserved it (1714)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)



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