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November 2012

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Today, multiple people admired my elaborate face paint. This happens every Halloween, at least every Halloween since I got badly burnt in a car accident. FML

#20142623
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43053) - you deserved it (1682)

On 11/01/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23138) - you deserved it (1653)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

#20163099
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22425) - you deserved it (1633)

On 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28227) - you deserved it (1613)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, I started at my first job. Within the first five minutes of arriving, I was followed around by a white guy who repeatedly sang to me, "Black people love making music" along with a few of his own songs. It resulted in me getting fired for bringing my "boyfriend" to work. I didn't even know him. FML

#20163535
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21616) - you deserved it (1606)

On 11/14/2012 at 8:04pm - work - by sarahijklmnop (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML

#20148667
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20360) - you deserved it (1593)

On 11/05/2012 at 9:02am - misc - by liquorless (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a booth at a very expensive craft show. My grandma came to show her support. While there, she managed to knock over my display, get in the way of potential buyers and take down a rather old lady when she supposedly stumbled. This all happened in the first five minutes she was there. FML

#20167730
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19384) - you deserved it (1591)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:02am - work - by soldnone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to forcibly separate a boy from my daughter after he grabbed her and started shoving her around. I complained to his mother, only to have her shout, "mind your fucking business" and say that her son can do whatever the hell he wants. FML

#20168309
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28232) - you deserved it (1584)

On 11/18/2012 at 4:22pm - kids - by WELL FUCK YOU KINDLY, MA'AM (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

#20159898
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19255) - you deserved it (1570)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:25am - health - by KtSue - United States

Today, after almost four years of having avoided her due to her hatred of my husband, my mother invited us both to a family dinner. My husband wanted to give her another chance, so we went. Less than an hour after arriving, I caught her hocking a loogie and spitting it into our food. FML

#20182910
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24983) - you deserved it (1568)

On 11/28/2012 at 6:04pm - love - by some things never change (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was severely chewed out by my boss because, according to him, I look down on him too often. I'm 6ft5. FML

#20162604
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23128) - you deserved it (1567) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/13/2012 at 4:23pm - work - by makiju - Sent from mobile version

Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML

#20163905
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19707) - you deserved it (1566)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a big job interview. Everything went well at first, with the interviewer being impressed by my CV. I was then interrogated over not having a Facebook account, and practically accused of being a criminal, because people without them "always have something to hide". FML

#20165792
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22488) - you deserved it (1560)

On 11/16/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)



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