Today, the person that interviewed me for a job was the same person I called a "fat bitch" at a baseball game after she knocked over my drink while she was dancing. She recognized me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6037) - you deserved it (26052)
On 10/16/2012 at 12:16am - work - by leafscupwin - Canada (Ontario)
Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7870) - you deserved it (25978)
On 10/13/2012 at 2:45am - health - by lalalalainie - United States (California)
Today, I was fiddling around with the thermostat at my new place. For a laugh, I twisted the knob all the way to 40° celsius, when it snapped off. I don't have a clue how to fix it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5529) - you deserved it (25401)
On 10/06/2012 at 4:29pm - misc - by didntknowyoucouldbreakit (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8035) - you deserved it (24386)
On 10/23/2012 at 9:19am - money - by Dinger1992 - United States
Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5350) - you deserved it (24063)
On 10/26/2012 at 8:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, my friend and I were walking home when we saw a patch of wet cement. Taking a page out of every single Disney movie ever made, we wrote our names in it. What Disney movies don't show is when the neighbors tattle on you and you have to pay $500 to get the cement redone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6454) - you deserved it (23654)
On 10/24/2012 at 10:36pm - money - by onlyme (woman) - United States
Today, I went on a date to the movies with this guy I kinda like. When he was driving me home, he asked me to be his girlfriend; I said I couldn’t because it was really bad timing. He kicked me out of the car, called me an asshole, and made me walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11618) - you deserved it (23251)
On 10/03/2012 at 9:47am - misc - by lonerboner (woman) - United States
Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5680) - you deserved it (22517)
On 10/08/2012 at 6:27pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I discovered a way to send a massive number of text messages to someone simultaneously, so I decided to do it to my friend as a prank. I quickly noticed that I forgot to disable the delivery notification feature. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2580) - you deserved it (22297) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 10/19/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by Jugan - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, after being totally in love with a guy since middle school, I finally had enough self confidence to go and talk to him. Turns out he's boring as fuck. I obsessed over this guy for nearly 4 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8066) - you deserved it (22229)
On 10/18/2012 at 10:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7897) - you deserved it (21548)
On 10/11/2012 at 10:02am - love - by goodeyesight (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)
Today, while making love to my wife, I felt adventurous and told her to hit me. She didn't so much as hesitate before savagely slapping me with her ring hand. Now I'm back home from the hospital, with stitches closing up a huge gash on my cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8790) - you deserved it (21505)
On 10/19/2012 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Czech Republic (Jihomoravsky kraj)
Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6319) - you deserved it (21250)
On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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