Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, as I entered a stairwell, the fire alarm went off, triggering the automatic fire doors to close. The one I was walking through ran over my foot, ripping my toenail, and then smacked me in the face. FML

#20113123
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19372) - you deserved it (1588)

On 10/12/2012 at 1:58am - misc - by minustoenail - United States (California)

Today, for the second week in a row, my brother woke me up in the small hours of the morning begging me to help him figure out the math problem to turn off his phone's stupid-ass app alarm. FML

#20115354
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19519) - you deserved it (1575)

On 10/13/2012 at 6:25pm - misc - by fucking fratricidal (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had to serve my boyfriend's father with a restraining order. FML

#20096065
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20427) - you deserved it (1575)

On 09/30/2012 at 11:21pm - love - by notgivingup (woman) - United States

Today, I had a cyst in my butt removed. The doctors had to make a hole, and then fill it with gauze before sending me home. As soon as I got back, my sister decided to kick me in the butt as hard as she could. FML

#20119594
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27247) - you deserved it (1553)

On 10/16/2012 at 1:25pm - health - by hurtinrealbad - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got threatened to get dragged out of the window at work because I wouldn't sell someone hot wings. I work at Taco Bell. FML

#20123506
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20704) - you deserved it (1543)

On 10/19/2012 at 2:43am - work - by Taco Hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML

#20127937
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22669) - you deserved it (1538)

On 10/22/2012 at 5:01am - love - by reserved - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my room, only to find my 15-year-old brother violating my old teddy bear. FML

#20126784
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21761) - you deserved it (1535)

On 10/21/2012 at 2:54pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML

#20128657
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18874) - you deserved it (1535)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm - misc - by musicthief - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

#20141617
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21033) - you deserved it (1532)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:23pm - animals - by orilykid (man) - United States (California)

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

#20122351
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21008) - you deserved it (1519)

On 10/18/2012 at 10:41am - animals - by Annonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I slipped on a crayon a little girl threw on the floor, causing me to drop the tray of water I was carrying, making me spill it all over her. After getting cussed out by her mom, I was fired for making a customer unhappy. FML

#20115984
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22487) - you deserved it (1512)

On 10/14/2012 at 1:29am - work - by bbbbb - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML

#20130988
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24964) - you deserved it (1507)

On 10/24/2012 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML

#20127982
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22864) - you deserved it (1506)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: