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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27888) - you deserved it (1998)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47856) - you deserved it (1998)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML

#20101402
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26096) - you deserved it (1993)

On 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25994) - you deserved it (1992)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML

#20121409
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25313) - you deserved it (1988)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:15pm - kids - by Mouse (woman) -

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

#20104274
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16846) - you deserved it (1958)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm - work - by The Last Cockbender (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I realized I might lose my job because some asshole customer complained about me to my district manager. His complaint? Girls can't work at video game stores. My DM agreed. FML

#20098150
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28643) - you deserved it (1959)

On 10/02/2012 at 9:11am - work - by GamerTag (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML

#20110797
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21446) - you deserved it (1953)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by scaredofcutouts (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend went to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. All I could make out from the door was mumbling, until profanities started flying. My boyfriend shouted "well she's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormed out of the house. My dad still refuses to tell me what happened in there. FML

#20131535
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31598) - you deserved it (1952)

On 10/24/2012 at 5:08pm - love - by wtactualfuck :( (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

#20104191
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24409) - you deserved it (1951)

On 10/06/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by FML_Elle - United States

Today, my mother was digging up our Halloween decorations, and found the Christmas decorations as well. She's shoddily decorated the house already in half-Halloween and half-Christmas style to save time. I guess we'll be celebrating Christmasween for the rest of the year. FML

#20103809
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13080) - you deserved it (1934)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:57am - misc - by Joey - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML

#20133698
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24114) - you deserved it (1926)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML

#20133890
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23265) - you deserved it (1918)

On 10/26/2012 at 3:58am - health - by Weasel123 - United States (Oklahoma)



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