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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is four months pregnant. She can't wait for us to be parents. I guess she forgot that I haven't seen her in 7 months. FML

#20118231
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37034) - you deserved it (2234)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:27pm - love - by 3023-dang - United States

Today, a cashier asked me if I would like to donate to breast cancer research. Since I have already made my donations this month, I politely declined. The cashier snorted and said, "Maybe you'll feel differently if someone you love got cancer." I'm a two-year survivor. FML

#20130942
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42377) - you deserved it (2219)

On 10/24/2012 at 5:21am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

#20104274
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19211) - you deserved it (2211)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm - work - by The Last Cockbender (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML

#20109681
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24458) - you deserved it (2209)

On 10/09/2012 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28296) - you deserved it (2199)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, trying to be nice, I asked my little sister how school was. She burst into a temper tantrum and screamed at me to fuck off. She's eight. FML

#20132869
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22814) - you deserved it (2182)

On 10/25/2012 at 3:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a job interview for a job I've been dying to have. As I'm walking into the office, the manager says, "Aren't you my son's ex, the one he cheated on?" All I could do was sit there quietly as he laughed at me. FML

#20129479
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27248) - you deserved it (2176)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:54am - work - by emilyparra1 - United States (Florida)

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50379) - you deserved it (2174)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized I might lose my job because some asshole customer complained about me to my district manager. His complaint? Girls can't work at video game stores. My DM agreed. FML

#20098150
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31545) - you deserved it (2170)

On 10/02/2012 at 9:11am - work - by GamerTag (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found a ticket on my motorcycle for not parking in a designated spot. The space I had parked my bike in was occupied by a large van. Some asshole had moved my bike. FML

Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML

#20121409
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26994) - you deserved it (2149)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:15pm - kids - by Mouse (woman) -

Today, I went bowling. I noticed a 10-year-old holding an iPod Touch which had the exact same customized case with my name on it as my iPod that was stolen a year ago at the same bowling centre. Even better, the parents yelled at me for accusing him. I got kicked out the bowling centre. FML

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML

#20110797
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23449) - you deserved it (2139)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by scaredofcutouts (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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