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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at work, boss asked mey I wasn't adering to proper dress code. I pointed out tat skinny jeans r in te dress code, toic e replied, ( Only if you're skinny. ) FML

#20102886
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22142) - you deserved it (11932)

On 10/05/2012 at 12:40pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

TODAY, I REALIZED THAT AT AGE 54, I'M NO LONGER YOUNG ENOUGH TO GO COMMANDO ANYMORE. EVERY TIME I SNEEZED TODAY, I PEED MYSELF. FML

#20102528
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18401) - you deserved it (11552)

On 10/05/2012 at 4:14am - health - by Darla (woman) - United States (California)

Today , while at a pool party , I found out the reason I got my new , white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet!! I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling!! FML

#20119331
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19984) - you deserved it (11267)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I bought professional hair clippers to shave down below, thinking it would be safer than using a razor. Let's just say the bathroom now looks like a murder scene, and it's going to be a while before I have sex again. FML

#20124733
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26243) - you deserved it (11257)

On 10/20/2012 at 12:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

TODAY I WAS SINGING ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS IN MY CAR WHILE AT A RED LIGHT. A GUY MADE IT A POINT TO GET MY ATTENTION AND SAID "IF YOUR REALLY GOING TO SING THAT BAD YOU SHOULD PROBABLY ROLL YUR WINDOW UP." FML

#20126033
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15809) - you deserved it (10484)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grlfriend an I were getting intimate, an I gave er a condom to putted on me. Se tried to open it wit er teet, but ripped it. Tat was my only condom. I'm now sitting ere watcing a soap opera wit a boner. FML

#20129928
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31520) - you deserved it (10221)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States

Today bafora laaving mah housa I OCD-chackad all of mah doors 16 timas to maka sura that thay wara lockad!! Whan I got homa mah housa had baan brokan into!! Turns out I accidantally unlockad mah front door whan trying to lock it for tha last tima!! This is why I hava OCD!! FML

#20141026
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21389) - you deserved it (9340)

On 10/30/2012 at 11:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today , after having bought mah daughter a complete set of new school clothes , she threw a tantrum and refused to wear them. I told her she could either wear them , or go to school naked. She made if half-way down the street in the nude before I caught up and dragged her back inside. FML

#20102964
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26818) - you deserved it (9339)

On 10/05/2012 at 2:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wokingham)

Today , I told my daugter tat se won't be going to er omecoming dance as punisment 4 er terrible grades. Se's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in er room 4 ours. At tis point , I don't know if I need to call a terapist or a vocal coac. FML

#20117570
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25883) - you deserved it (9172)

On 10/15/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today.. . mah 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant . The father is mah 15-year-old son . FML

#20111886
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75324) - you deserved it (8810)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend an tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML

#20110590
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24858) - you deserved it (8676)

On 10/10/2012 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by hairynips (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today I had mah frst orgasm. Unfortunately it was during breakup sex.

#20110068
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31047) - you deserved it (8517)

On 10/10/2012 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Depression... (woman) - United States

Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turnd to me and said, ( You're really bad at this. ) I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. mega FML

#20117136
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17688) - you deserved it (7945)

On 10/14/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by amiliaroberts123 (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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