Today, I fell asleep during a job interview as it was taking place over the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6203) - you deserved it (16666)
On 04/30/2012 at 9:28am - work - by jobless (woman) - United States
Today, I took a pregnancy test. I waited the longest two minutes of my life just to realize I missed the stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6690) - you deserved it (16555)
On 04/05/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by darkestbarbie - United States (Georgia)
Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (16527)
On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)
Today, I was bragging about how I had lost 10 pounds. Grinning, I pulled my shirt up and tried to show how big my jeans were on me. Instead, the button flew off my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6533) - you deserved it (16496)
On 04/13/2012 at 6:32am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5199) - you deserved it (16362)
On 04/24/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by monkeycannon7 - United States (Virginia)
Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9622) - you deserved it (16251)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)
Today, a lady told me her husband had sinus surgery. I replied, "Oh, I know someone who just had that done." I then realized I meant Alexis on The Real Housewives of the OC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4725) - you deserved it (16146)
On 04/03/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by gaagaa - United States
Today, I was escorted out of the building for getting in a scuffle at my anger management class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4848) - you deserved it (15675)
On 04/07/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by breakfast tea (man) - Hong Kong
Today, I realized my Internet addiction had gone too far when I tried to Google what was in my freezer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4295) - you deserved it (15290)
On 04/05/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6658) - you deserved it (15199)
On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)
Today, after having been told that I looked horrible for the last five months, I decided to give myself a make-over. As soon as the make-up artist was done, I told her I didn't like it, and that I still didn't like how I look. She simply replied: ''Well, I'm a make-up artist, not a magician!'' FML
I agree, your life sucks (9907) - you deserved it (15191)
On 04/05/2012 at 8:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands
Today, I actually used Febreze as a substitute for deodorant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5663) - you deserved it (14918)
On 04/06/2012 at 3:24am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while walking to work, I swore I saw one of my old friends from college standing in the park across the street. I started shouting her name and waving my hands like a maniac to get her attention. It was a statue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7357) - you deserved it (14441)
On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - misc - by Becca (woman) - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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