Today, my dad informed me that my prom dress makes me look chubby from the side, gives me "back fat", and that I wouldn't want to go to prom looking like that. I tried to ignore his hurtful comments and tell myself I was beautiful. Then the clasp broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18719) - you deserved it (7201)
On 03/16/2012 at 3:13am - misc - by Winx - United States (Alaska)
Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14391) - you deserved it (7004)
On 03/27/2012 at 1:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my son asked me for advice over his girlfriend not "respecting" his pathetic need for near-constant sex. I got so bored listening to the misogynistic horse-shit spewing out of his mouth that I totally zoned out. I came to as he started hurling abuse at me for not siding with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20603) - you deserved it (6984)
On 03/05/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Alfie4 (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I passed a field where some kids were playing football. The ball rolled over in my direction, so they asked me to kick it over. I tried and failed three times, and ended up throwing it over, where it embarrassingly landed about 2 feet away. They had to come over and get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15480) - you deserved it (6975)
On 03/22/2012 at 1:21pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)
Today, I realized that I am so sexually deprived that I get aroused when plugging my headphones into my computer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17565) - you deserved it (6936)
On 03/13/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Wow (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19905) - you deserved it (6929)
On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States
Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23034) - you deserved it (6919)
On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)
Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23044) - you deserved it (6855)
On 03/21/2012 at 3:27am - intimacy - by ReallyBro (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, two drop dead gorgeous Australians asked me for directions. Being so shocked by their beauty and accents, I couldn't get words out of my mouth. The one said to the other "Nope she doesn't speak English", then walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15047) - you deserved it (6841)
On 03/24/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by jennag5 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, after she confessed to still being in love with me. I logged into Facebook after she left, only to find her status set to "I think I just made a big mistake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18234) - you deserved it (6810)
On 03/13/2012 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26146) - you deserved it (6804)
On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18291) - you deserved it (6791)
On 03/15/2012 at 4:44pm - love - by W45T3D_Y0UTH (woman) - Canada
Today, I was holding our weekly poker game with a few work buddies. My psychotic, live-in mother-in-law wasted no time jumping into the game, cheating me out of $150, my new wristwatch, and what little pride I had left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11271) - you deserved it (6770)
On 03/30/2012 at 7:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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