Today, I cut myself while shaving my globes. My girlfriend now refuses to stop teasing me about being "fisted by Edward Scissorhands." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15349) - you deserved it (5416)
On 02/26/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by still learning - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, a stranger told me how proud he was that my boyfriend and I were so open with our sexuality. For the past three years, most strangers have thought we are a pair of gay men. I am a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24761) - you deserved it (5283)
On 02/02/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by Mrs. Man (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I realized the $40 iPhone case I bought to keep my new phone from getting scratched, scratched my iPhone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18833) - you deserved it (5222)
On 02/19/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by LadyGore - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23728) - you deserved it (5163)
On 02/20/2012 at 9:23am - intimacy - by Gabi - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I finally received my passport. Too bad my flight to Italy left last week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18386) - you deserved it (5127)
On 02/13/2012 at 11:22pm - misc - by ontherun2012 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18303) - you deserved it (5095)
On 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm - health - by screwed - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I received a parking fine for $147. My car isn't even worth that much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16610) - you deserved it (5042)
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19274) - you deserved it (5042)
On 02/17/2012 at 8:25am - misc - by BOOP - United States (Montana)
Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16184) - you deserved it (5030)
On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (5005)
On 02/13/2012 at 4:23pm - kids - by Katherine - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26566) - you deserved it (4994)
On 02/01/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by stainseverywhere (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17041) - you deserved it (4923)
On 02/24/2012 at 3:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29972) - you deserved it (4910)
On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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