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November 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I learned that when you're talking about your girlfriend's 6'4", 250 lb dad in a negative way, you should really make sure he isn't around first. FML

#21295068
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17659) - you deserved it (34177)

On 11/08/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by jlong9071 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML

#21293428
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26288) - you deserved it (32937)

On 11/06/2014 at 2:09pm - work - by NoJobNovember - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML

#21294812
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17418) - you deserved it (32564)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

#21294686
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16277) - you deserved it (29643)

On 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML

#21299758
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18422) - you deserved it (27235)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

#21300928
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16686) - you deserved it (27078)

On 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I tried being rebellious for the first time in my life by sneaking out past my curfew. I decided to use my bedroom window to stealthily leave the house. I ended up twisting my ankle when I tried to make my "grand" escape. FML

#21294808
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20293) - you deserved it (26211)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:33pm - health - by thatsureshowedme (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I finally got off my lazy ass and start studying for my upcoming exam. It was going pretty well, until my classmate called and after I proudly told him about my sudden motivation, the only thing he had to say was, "You got the date wrong, the exam was on thursday." FML

#21290636
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (23418)

On 11/02/2014 at 4:38pm - work - by demotivator (woman) - Romania (Timis)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend after I found him cheating on me with my best friend. It ended up with me apologising for spying on him. FML

#21293948
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32720) - you deserved it (15340)

On 11/07/2014 at 7:28am - love - by Turnaround (woman) -

Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML

#21289474
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28323) - you deserved it (13853)

On 11/01/2014 at 1:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML

#21293677
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29319) - you deserved it (13251)

On 11/06/2014 at 8:55pm - animals - by dwood08 - United States (New York)

Today, I realized why the lady I had complimented the night before on Halloween about her amazing one-armed costume, looked so hurt. She is literally missing an arm. I'm an asshole. FML

#21289586
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32934) - you deserved it (12198)

On 11/01/2014 at 8:58am - misc - by That Guy - United States (Florida)

Today, my sweet tooth went to a whole different level when I took a swig out of a bottle of maple syrup. FML



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