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Sunday 29 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

#21008990
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23611) - you deserved it (49575)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

#21009159
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43830) - you deserved it (22107)

On 12/29/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by Jizzyface (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I ran for the first time in ages when I saw my bus coming. My loose shoe went flying into a shop doorway, and I tripped into the gutter. FML

#21009861
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30952) - you deserved it (5378)

On 12/29/2013 at 10:52pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML

#21009083
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37758) - you deserved it (3657)

On 12/29/2013 at 4:05am - love - by heart broken - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to see "Frozen," which she had been talking about for weeks. After I bought the snacks, she told me that she couldn't believe I was going to watch a princess movie and walked out on me for not being "manly." She took the popcorn with her. FML

#21009271
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46478) - you deserved it (3621)

On 12/29/2013 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML

#21009563
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37366) - you deserved it (3443)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by Kayak (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was mopping the floor at the hotel I work at. Before I could react, a gentleman stormed through the corridor and slipped and fell on the still wet floor. He complained to the owner, who bitched me out just to satisfy the guy. FML

#21009463
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32210) - you deserved it (3387)

On 12/29/2013 at 4:04pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, me and some friends had home-made burgers for lunch. The guy who did the cooking later insisted that spitting in a frying pan is a perfectly acceptable way of guessing the right time to add the oil. FML

#21009569
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35026) - you deserved it (3031)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:28pm - health - by HungerStrike (man) - Czech Republic (Stredocesky kraj)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37510) - you deserved it (2968)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend told me that we need to talk. I think he dumped me, but I'm not sure, because he muttered it in Russian and quickly left. FML

#21009542
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37532) - you deserved it (2727)

On 12/29/2013 at 5:58pm - love - by RustyRuski (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



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