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Wednesday 12 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37546) - you deserved it (68165)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mother threw away my brand new headphones. She saw them on the couch with duct tape on the wires and assumed they were "old, broken, and cheap." I put the tape there to avoid damaging the wires. FML

#20720827
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43366) - you deserved it (13041)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:59am - money - by why mom, why? - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally left some music playing on my iPad, then left to do some errands. When I came back, I found it smashed into a million pieces. Apparently, grandpa couldn't find any other way to "shut off that goddamn music." FML

#20722030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47874) - you deserved it (10761)

On 06/12/2013 at 5:45pm - misc - by MsGlaDos - United States (Texas)

Today, I left my dog in the car while I quickly ran into a store. I came out to a woman smashing at my window, screaming that it was too hot in the car for the dog and saying I was being inhumane. The car was still running and the air conditioning was on. FML

#20721457
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57404) - you deserved it (8232)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:47pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was bombarded with phone calls from debt collectors. After some investigation, it turns out my grandma, who has dementia, has been going into our mailbox and throwing away the outgoing mail because it wasn't addressed to her. I'm now apparently 3 months behind in payments. FML

#20720825
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44883) - you deserved it (7646)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:57am - money - by redvolvo23 - United States

Today, whilst trying on wedding dresses with my mom, she told me that I looked fat and awful in the dress I liked. When I told her how hurtful she was being, she told me that I should be grateful that she told me what she thought instead of laughing at me behind my back. FML

#20722079
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43232) - you deserved it (6710)

On 06/12/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by mysea8679 (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML

#20721311
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58086) - you deserved it (5684)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

#20720952
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49496) - you deserved it (4954)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML

#20720945
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58071) - you deserved it (4133)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:10am - misc - by Are you f*cking kidding me (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML

#20721539
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52555) - you deserved it (4084)

On 06/12/2013 at 1:33pm - health - by unknown - United States (California)

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64007) - you deserved it (3436)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am feeling freezing cold and soaking wet. It turns out that my dad had opened my window when I was sleeping, and rain water had been pouring in on me all night. My hair, face, pillow, blankets, alarm clock, and homework were all soaked as well. FML

#20722563
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46522) - you deserved it (3201)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:40pm - misc - by Anon - Canada (Ontario)



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