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Sunday 28 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

#20627981
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31421) - you deserved it (65724)

On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

#20627029
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18336) - you deserved it (46726)

On 04/28/2013 at 5:09am - work - by stupid voicemails - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my ten-year-old sister had to write out my job application because no one can read my terrible handwriting. FML

#20628506
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21424) - you deserved it (33860)

On 04/28/2013 at 7:40pm - work - by AbhorrentApplication (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I popped a pimple while stopped at a red light. When I looked over the woman in the car next to me was hysterically laughing, and had her camera phone out. FML

#20627066
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (13483)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:28am - health - by msarosi - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML

#20628307
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40224) - you deserved it (11294)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by shameless - United States (Georgia)

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML

#20627240
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49219) - you deserved it (10900)

On 04/28/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, my parents decided to wake me up on my birthday. They flashed the lights and yanked off my bed sheets. I sleep naked. FML

#20627190
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49616) - you deserved it (10069)

On 04/28/2013 at 9:16am - misc - by Beth - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML

#20627653
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48517) - you deserved it (6509)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by gibbette (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

#20628087
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51602) - you deserved it (6383)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, six weeks before my wedding, my mother decided to claim that she never agreed on paying for it and that she doesn't think she will. Now I have six weeks to scavenge enough cash for the wedding she planned in the first place. FML

#20626669
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46525) - you deserved it (3726)

On 04/28/2013 at 12:29am - money - by need_cash_now (man) - United States

Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML

#20627067
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59794) - you deserved it (3154)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by wtfisgoingon (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML

#20628024
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40539) - you deserved it (2914)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

#20626789
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42302) - you deserved it (2858)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by lonesome - Canada



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