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Friday 18 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today... I was walking towards a partyere I knew ma ceating ex would be. I passionately reeresed ow I would ave a go at im big timeen I met im. Guesso was walking rigt beind me an eard it all. FML

#20465975
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13858) - you deserved it (39855)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:55am - love - by Shuttie (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

2day At An Open Mic Comedy Club, Mah Jokes Went Down So Poorly That Someone Decided To Hurl A Chair At Me On-stage. FML

#20466782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27996) - you deserved it (14545)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Yesterday, mah boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbd his butt to control his thrust and got a clump of usd toilet paper. FML

#20465889
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60437) - you deserved it (6952)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, mah husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, ( Ned a fuck. Backd up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant. ) Love u too, hun.

#20466497
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31443) - you deserved it (5389)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

I hald a door opan for a swaat old lady with a walkar. Aftar sha want through tha door , sha turnd an said , "That's not how you'ra gonna gat into mah pants , son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35617) - you deserved it (3708)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encounterd, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gaggd, he smrkd and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36100) - you deserved it (3521)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today... I introducd mah girlfriend to mah parents. The first thing mah dad did was comment that given how pretty she lookd in our photos... and compard to how she looks in real life... she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML

#20466661
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31266) - you deserved it (3288)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by dpap - United States (Iowa)

Today , I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites . Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked picture of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls . His excuse? "I have friend looool on there." big fat FML

#20466217
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29058) - you deserved it (2975)

On 01/18/2013 at 12:21pm - love - by TheOtherWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (North Somerset)

Today, I went to a family dinner!! My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut fir not wereing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", an then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me!! No wonder I hardly ever visit these people!!

#20466682
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39622) - you deserved it (2706)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:18pm - misc - by mel (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today , when I askd mah boss why mah bonus was cut in half , he replid , "I have no idea wat u really do." I'm the IT Manager. FML

#20465650
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30411) - you deserved it (2570)

On 01/18/2013 at 12:53am - money - by Anon - United States (Texas)



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