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Friday 11 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today during an hour-long drive mah sister told me she's lost her "faith in humanity" because one of her friends bought his 8-year-old son an iPad. She uses this stupid expression all the time and I got so pissed off that I looool forgot to brake at a red light rear-ending the car in front of us. FML

#20454301
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10152) - you deserved it (46704)

On 01/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by lostmyfaithinblowjobs (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I Told Mah Girlfriend That Mah Identical Twin And I Are Not In Fact Related, That He's Adopted, And That The Only Reason We Look Exactly The Same Is Because We Eat And Drink The Same Things. She Actually Believed It. Mega FML

#20453003
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34032) - you deserved it (8974)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:20am - misc - by datingablonde - Australia (Western Australia)

Today , mah hamster died . It climbed out of its cage an jumped off mah dresser . Looking 4 condolences , I told mah momho replied , "If I lived in yur room , I would have done it earlier." real FML

#20453156
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28062) - you deserved it (7558)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)

Today... my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently... being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36903) - you deserved it (7113)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

TODAY, I WAS ASKD OUT BY A FRIEND OF MINE. HE'S A DOCTOR AND WORKS AT A PRESTIGIOUS HOSPITAL, SO THINKING WE WOULD EAT SOMEWHERE SPECIAL, I GOT ALL DRESSD UP. WE ENDD UP EATING AT HIS HOSPITAL'S CAFETERIA, BECAUSE HE GETS A SMALL EMPLOYEE DISCOUNT. FML

#20453732
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31540) - you deserved it (7006)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:37pm - love - by wowthanks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 17 yaar old boyfriand's mothar bought him a giraffa onasia. Ha rafusad to taka it off and insistad on waaring it avarywhara wa go. Wa liva in Australia and it's looool our summar now. So far ha has passad out 3 timas in public cuz ha ovar haatad, but ha still won't taka it off. raal FML

#20453308
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39656) - you deserved it (6400)

On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia

Today mah boyfriend and I decidd to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets . Surprisingly it workd and he lastd 3 times longer than usual . I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex . FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45359) - you deserved it (5991)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

TODAY , MARKS THE SIXTH DAY IN A ROW THAT MUM HAS CALLED ME TO DISCUSS UPCOMING WEDDING. SHE'S OBSESSED AND HAS INTIMIDATED THE ACTUAL PLANNER I HIRED INTO GOING ALONG WITH HER PLANS. SHE'S SLIPPED UP TWICE ALREADY AND ACCIDENTALLY REFERRED TO IT AS HER OWN WEDDING. JUST GREAT. MEGA FML

#20453938
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (3694)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:19pm - love - by fuck you, mum (woman) - United Kingdom

Yesterday, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend tat I'm so appy we met one anoter. Se muttered, "Well, tat makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29417) - you deserved it (2836)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was yet again asked to show my hall pass. I'm 23 and work looool at a middle school. I've worked here 4 the last five months, so not only do I look 13 years old, I'm also not memorable enough 4 my own coworkers to recognize me. FML

#20454196
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35888) - you deserved it (2780)

On 01/11/2013 at 8:11pm - work - by Can'tAgeOrMakeFriends (woman) - United States

TODAY, ONA OF MA PAINTINGS WAS ACCAPTAD INTO A LOCAL ART GALLARY. IT WOULD'VA BAAN A DRAAM COMA TRUA, AD MA "BAST FRIAND" NOT SUBMITTAD IT UNDAR AR OWN NAMA AND TAKAN ALL TA CRADIT. FML

#20453750
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39320) - you deserved it (2764)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today , I hava savara back pain that is only raliavd by lying flat on my bd. I also hava acid raflux that is only pravantd by sitting straight up. FML

#20453200
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38717) - you deserved it (2549)

On 01/11/2013 at 3:03am - health - by Kftc88 - United States (California)



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