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Wednesday 26 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at a post-Christmas party, I saw a cute girl standing underneath a mistletoe. I walked up to her and pointed out that we were both standing under a mistletoe. She looked at me, winced, and quickly walked away. FML

#20424412
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17916) - you deserved it (20696)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I unwrapped my present and, to my surprise, I had gotten a repair manual for my truck. Apparently, my parents are "Tired of seeing that piece of shit in front of our house." FML

#20423026
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12567) - you deserved it (19711)

On 12/26/2012 at 3:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40509) - you deserved it (4806)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50041) - you deserved it (4721)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after giving my husband a new video game that he's been wanting, along with homemade waffles and a surprise blowjob, he gave me my gift: two packets of ramen noodles, and toilet paper. FML

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

#20423470
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39850) - you deserved it (4021)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

#20423697
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50425) - you deserved it (3531)

On 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by gaggin - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

#20423285
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44070) - you deserved it (3436)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:32am - love - by Jolene - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up from an explicit dream involving my dentist. I'm scheduled for a conscious sedation appointment with him in two hours and I'm terrified of what I might say or do while I'm under. FML

#20423262
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26864) - you deserved it (2918)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to a urinal next to an elderly gentleman. As I was doing my business, he zips up and begins to leave. On his way out, he leans over my shoulder and whispers in my ear, "That's nice". FML

#20424687
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34519) - you deserved it (2756)

On 12/26/2012 at 11:03pm - misc - by hborkowski (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML

#20422819
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25783) - you deserved it (2478)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:15am - misc - by marriedtoatool - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mother-in-law purchased matching Christmas presents for myself and my sister-in-law to open together in front of everyone. Guess who are now the proud owners of matching metal tampon cases. FML

#20423057
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29996) - you deserved it (2363)

On 12/26/2012 at 3:53am - misc - by Shelle (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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