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I WAS VISITING MA DAUGTER,OSE USBAND WAS STILL ASLEEP AT NOON!! I MADE A POINT OF STOMPING AROUND ON TE ARDWOOD FLOOR AND SPEAKING LOUDLY TO WAKE IS LAZY ASS UP!! TURNS OUT E'S NOW WORKING A 14-OUR GRAVEYARD SIFT, AND IT AS NO NEGATIVE EFFECT ON IS SOE-TROWING SKILLS!! FML
Today, I was bartending . A guest was getting belligerent so I ad to cut im off . He calld me a bitc and trew te rest of is drink in my face before storming off . Te belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend . big fat FML
Today, as mah friend was rudely rummaging through mah phone, she saw a picture of the pottery I've painted her for Christmas . Not only did she see it, but she also declared it ugly . That's probably the present I'm the most proud of this Christmas . FML
I droppd mah handbag into a water-filld gutter. As I was hurriedly fishing out the contents of mah bag... I lookd up. There was mah ex... with the girl he left me fir walking past... timd exactly to coincide with me manically scooping up one of many rapidly absorbing tampons.
Today , in my AP Biology class , a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming , tohich my friend gushed , "Yeah! It's been melted for , like , months." FML
Today, I found out that wife,ho is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entre bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse,hen I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML
Today, one of mah work colleagues was staring at mah severe sunburn. She wantd to know if she could "peel" me, when mah sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no 4 an answer, an I work with her everyday this week. FML
Friday 27 March 2015