Monday 18 June 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8627) - you deserved it (23813)
On 06/18/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by Brittany (woman) - United States
Today, I realized I have been single for far too long when I was turning off porno after porno because I couldn't stand the horrible acting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14454) - you deserved it (3645)
On 06/18/2012 at 6:22am - intimacy - by the critic (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33882) - you deserved it (2725)
On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend told me that she's a different person without coffee and smokes in the morning, she wasn't kidding; after I'd asked her how she'd slept, she bitched me out for "mocking her" and hurled a hairdryer at my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16234) - you deserved it (2485)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:57am - love - by crazybitch - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15637) - you deserved it (2096)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:05pm - misc - by Myriam (woman) - Maldives (Maale)
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23076) - you deserved it (2057)
On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States
Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17945) - you deserved it (1618)
On 06/18/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at work when a co-worker decided it would be funny to email me from my boss's computer to tell me I had been laid off. It wasn't funny when I was fired for real after "skipping work without giving notice." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23846) - you deserved it (1457)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:39am - work - by Adam Jensen - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was forced to listen to a client rant about her lackluster sexual encounters with her husband. I was also given a rather detailed description of his manhood. Apparently, it's small. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14329) - you deserved it (1429)
On 06/18/2012 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by raraisbang - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I had my blood drawn for a lab test. I was then given a container so I could give a urine sample. In the middle of peeing, I got woozy, started blacking out, and hit my head against the wall. A nurse discovered me with my pants down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16590) - you deserved it (1261)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:05pm - health - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was once again passed over for a promotion. I'm now the assistant to a kid who has failed to meet almost every single responsibility he's been given before. It's my job to make sure he's successful, and if he isn't, I'll lose my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19085) - you deserved it (1220)
On 06/18/2012 at 3:49pm - misc - by wenchfucker (man) - France (Lorraine)
Today, I got to see a waterfall up close. Too bad it was in my bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14067) - you deserved it (1206)
On 06/18/2012 at 11:31pm - misc - by ducklover1 - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
