Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6529) - you deserved it (14419)
On 05/20/2012 at 12:06am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (California)
Today, my sister got married. It was also the day that I was supposed to deliver a heartfelt toast to the happy couple. I got so nervous that I kept stuttering and finally ended with "Congrats Beth and Steve!" Her husband's name is Eric. Her ex was named Steve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18601) - you deserved it (6400)
On 05/20/2012 at 9:13am - misc - by shygirl - United States (Michigan)
Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14149) - you deserved it (5563)
On 05/20/2012 at 11:03am - health - by jcdc - United States (Texas)
Today, I was walking up some stairs, and I told the guy in front of me to be careful, as the handrail was loose and well-worn. I then put my hand on it, and promptly fell backwards down the stairs with a piece of handrail still in my hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11788) - you deserved it (3883)
On 05/20/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by taob (woman) - China (Guangxi)
Today, I decided to save a few bucks and let my mother cut my hair. I then had to wait in the hospital for attention due to the fact that she cut the tip of my ear off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18135) - you deserved it (2854)
On 05/20/2012 at 10:29pm - health - by thejbarrick50 - United States (New York)
Today, there is an annular solar eclipse. As I was buying the last pair of solar glasses to watch the eclipse with, some jerk snatched them out of my hands and bolted off with them. I now have to make the decision between watching the eclipse and not going blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13511) - you deserved it (2344)
On 05/20/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by VocalizedBoar - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18952) - you deserved it (1947)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17452) - you deserved it (1888)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend went in for a kiss too fast and broke my front tooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17867) - you deserved it (1469)
On 05/20/2012 at 1:19am - misc - by slayerdeath - United States (Indiana)
Today, it was the first time I was going to fly first class. I ended up in the bathroom almost the whole flight with diarrhea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16748) - you deserved it (1273)
On 05/20/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I went to a job interview at a small family-owned business. After the interview, the owner's son took me into his office and told me I'm not getting the job and to get out, because apparently, the old man thinks I'm "possessed by a demon". FML
I agree, your life sucks (15242) - you deserved it (1171)
On 05/20/2012 at 3:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16594) - you deserved it (1061)
On 05/20/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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