Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after watching an episode of New Girl, my boyfriend became obsessed with the "Cotton-eyed Joe" song. He won't stop playing it. FML

#20906604
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (4097)

On 10/03/2013 at 10:56pm - love - by Annoyed - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML

#20897734
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36980) - you deserved it (3992)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:18am - work - by ihatethisjob - United States (Michigan)

Today, there was a power outage at my apartment. I ended up deciding that the power wasn't going to come on any time soon, and that I should go to a hotel for the night. Just after I unpacked at the hotel, my neighbor called to say the power had come back. FML

#20942793
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19933) - you deserved it (39759)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by FUCKING POWER - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend texted me from a bar, saying they had just called my name in a raffle to win a trip to Aspen, CO. You had to be at the bar to claim the prize. I had left the bar half-an-hour earlier, not knowing they were even having a raffle. FML

#20920627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40597) - you deserved it (3956)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:14pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while working as a paramedic, we got called to an assisted living home. The medical emergency? The woman had a leak in her bathroom and wanted it fixed. FML

#20931468
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34403) - you deserved it (2226)

On 10/23/2013 at 6:41pm - health - by random - United States (Texas)

Today, I had an anxiety attack just from thinking about appearing on TV and being watched by a real audience. FML

#20925533
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33038) - you deserved it (5502)

On 10/18/2013 at 7:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML

#20973886
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41402) - you deserved it (7691)

On 11/28/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by aaannnddd there goes my boner (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my car wouldn't start because of the cold weather. Since I was at a friend's house, I asked him to jump-start it. After taking about ten minutes to start his vehicle and park it by mine, we found that both of our car hoods were frozen shut. FML

#20984021
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38947) - you deserved it (3445)

On 12/07/2013 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML

#21009083
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40294) - you deserved it (4295)

On 12/29/2013 at 4:05am - love - by heart broken - United States

Today, I was mopping the floor at the hotel I work at. Before I could react, a gentleman stormed through the corridor and slipped and fell on the still wet floor. He complained to the owner, who bitched me out just to satisfy the guy. FML

#21009463
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33246) - you deserved it (3502)

On 12/29/2013 at 4:04pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a whistle key finder from my grandma for Christmas. This would have been nice if I could actually whistle. FML

#21005460
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28644) - you deserved it (4432)

On 12/25/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by princesss_14 - United States (Texas)

Today, I went back to work after a horrible bout of respiratory illness. After a few hours of using hot tea, cough drops, and tissues to deal with my lingering cough, I found out that my asshole coworker has filed a formal complaint about me disrupting her concentration. FML

#21039586
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41434) - you deserved it (3845)

On 01/25/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home from a long day from work, only to find a strange woman in my apartment. She explained that my roommate told her it was OK to spend a few days here. I guess he forgot that the room was mine. FML

#21083808
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35888) - you deserved it (2970)

On 03/11/2014 at 3:21am - misc - by why me? (man) - United States (California)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: