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Today, I learned, 90 horrifying minutes into a college exam, that my 85-year-old calculus teacher had spent the last three weeks teaching us the wrong chapter. FML

#20997770
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47851) - you deserved it (2953)

On 12/19/2013 at 4:09am - work - by wasted time - United States

Today, I went on a 70-mile drive to the next town over to finally meet this beautiful girl I had talked to online. To my surprise, she looked exactly how she did in her pictures, minus the ring on her finger and the fiancé who wanted to punch me in the face. FML

#21006475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43355) - you deserved it (5546)

On 12/26/2013 at 6:57pm - love - by William Johnson - United States (Alaska)

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

#21007374
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36459) - you deserved it (4123)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

#21032373
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43923) - you deserved it (6372)

On 01/19/2014 at 12:17am - kids - by MommyProblems (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML

#21019092
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44024) - you deserved it (4623)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I downloaded Grindr to my phone. It also downloaded to my mom's phone, my dad's phone, and my brother's phone. FML

#21030290
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40474) - you deserved it (21478)

On 01/16/2014 at 9:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

#21023495
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49805) - you deserved it (4698)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:47am - misc - by wtf - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend saw a YouTube video of a guy throwing boiling water into the cold air, with the water immediately turning to ice and vapor. He copied it, but only succeeded in dousing himself with boiling water, then making me drive his idiot self to the hospital. FML

#21023480
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45038) - you deserved it (5324)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was breast feeding my son. Out of nowhere, he bit my nipple hard, causing me to scream in pain. He giggled with my nipple still between his teeth. FML

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37522) - you deserved it (4703)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML

#21031087
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50648) - you deserved it (6404)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I heard my sister talking to my mom about me, saying that I have the ability to suck the life out of a room like a Dementor. I walked in and asked what she meant by that. My mom replied, "She means you're an asshole." I love you too, mom. FML

#21055293
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35895) - you deserved it (6349)

On 02/09/2014 at 12:00pm - misc - by jigglepuff - United States (Arizona)

Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML

#21050455
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51734) - you deserved it (5202)

On 02/04/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by DeeDee - Austria (Wien)



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