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Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML

#20677176
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41661) - you deserved it (3985)

On 05/21/2013 at 2:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not remembering our anniversary. Our three week anniversary. FML

#20702606
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58508) - you deserved it (6808)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:31am - love - by BadBoyfriend - United States (Texas)

Today, I awoke from a dream that I'd found an Arco gas station that had regular gas for $3.38. I actually went looking for it. FML

#20679582
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37323) - you deserved it (9757)

On 05/22/2013 at 10:51am - money - by maarkblack (man) - United States

Today I returned home after a semester at university. I guess I did too good a job of getting into shape as my parents phoned the police, thinking I was a burglar. FML

#20679356
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38779) - you deserved it (3396)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was visiting my new in-laws for the first time. During an awkward silence, I took my phone and figured I'd send my friend a text jokingly saying "Mayday, mayday! Somebody save me!" My mood lightened up a little and I felt quite well until my mother-in-law's phone beeped. Yep. FML

#20690847
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22671) - you deserved it (43502)

On 05/28/2013 at 7:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47038) - you deserved it (3967)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, days after I broke up with my girlfriend, my dad tried to make her feel better by inviting her to our family BBQ next weekend. FML

#20715362
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44202) - you deserved it (5060)

On 06/09/2013 at 12:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, my grandmother made a rule that every time we take a crap, she has to examine the turds to make sure they aren't big enough to clog up the pipes. I don't know what's worse: that she looks at my turds, or the fact that she actively comments on them. FML

#20740202
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43852) - you deserved it (3194)

On 06/22/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I started my job at a kids summer camp. The first little girl to arrive told me to close my eyes and open my hand because she had a "surprise" for me. Yep, a dead, decomposed sparrow covered in all sorts of bugs sure is a surprise. FML

#20718832
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41466) - you deserved it (5155)

On 06/11/2013 at 12:39am - kids - by sydneyp3435 - United States (Texas)

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46811) - you deserved it (3304)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

#20758014
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53508) - you deserved it (5796)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I thought I was home alone. Likewise, my visiting grandfather thought he was alone. You can imagine the mutual surprise when I caught him stealing money from my sister's bedroom. FML

#20743925
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45608) - you deserved it (2730)

On 06/24/2013 at 1:38am - money - by pumboc (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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