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Today, I was in bed staring at two red lights coming from my DVD player. They reminded me of the terminator movies, and I had to unplug it. I'm 23 years old and scared of The Terminator. FML

#21080429
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37066) - you deserved it (8833)

On 03/07/2014 at 10:41am - misc - by scaredypants123 - United States

Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML

#21129433
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40142) - you deserved it (7435)

On 05/03/2014 at 6:38am - health - by cocacola999 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I'm 5 weeks pregnant and just found out that my boyfriend has such a phobia of holding babies, that he's going to be the one most in need of a diaper change when I give birth. FML

Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML

#21178066
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47962) - you deserved it (4279)

On 06/17/2014 at 1:34pm - misc - by luckycharmed (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up loudly screaming from a "night" terror. I say "night"; I was actually at my desk at work, in the middle of the day, surrounded by dozens of co-workers in their cubicles. FML

#21193942
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37311) - you deserved it (10495)

On 06/30/2014 at 3:51pm - work - by Whoopsie (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went directly from the shopping mall to the hospital. My sister had slammed my hand in the car door, all because I considered purchasing a dress that looked like something she might buy for herself. FML

#21235533
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42672) - you deserved it (3241)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:34am - health - by vicious_fashion (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my roommate asked for my opinion of her new painting. The same painting I hand-painted for over ten hours. She apparently thought it was a gift. She won't give it back. FML

#21251580
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40290) - you deserved it (3351)

On 09/04/2014 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML

#21261625
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35392) - you deserved it (5444)

On 09/20/2014 at 2:54am - misc - by pasquale - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a volleyball game, and we were down by 13 points. I looked up at the crowd, and my mom was shaking her head in disappointment. When it was my turn to serve, I aced them, and tied the score. When I looked up she was gone. She'd left. When I got home, I heard how I sucked for an hour. FML

#21260940
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42962) - you deserved it (2762)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:56pm - misc - by Lexi801 - United States (Utah)

Today, in the men's room a guy using the adjacent toilet dropped his phone, and it fell right next to my foot. The screen was facing upward, and looked like he was taking pictures of his junk in the office toilet. FML

#21269595
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35594) - you deserved it (3022)

On 10/02/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by Vkaz (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, before work, I was quickly cleaning when I tripped and the side of my neck hit the countertop, causing a dark bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop giving me high fives for getting laid and I was too embarrassed to tell them truth that I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML

#21277907
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (3567)

On 10/14/2014 at 8:13pm - misc - by ForeverAlone - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I left my dog alone while I went to work, like usual. He usually hangs out in the big bay window that faces the street. Today he decided to steal my vibrator and chew it while sitting in the window. I can only imagine how many people walked by and saw it. FML

#21295699
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33389) - you deserved it (6932)

On 11/09/2014 at 8:12pm - animals - by dogdays (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the local park for some romantic time together. By the time we left, I'd been called a pedo and a cradle robber, and been given several dirty looks. I'm 31. My boyfriend is 30 and just very baby-faced. FML

#21345623
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32271) - you deserved it (2776)

On 01/28/2015 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

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Friday 5 February 2016

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