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Today, I stood for half an hour in the rain waiting for my bus. As I started to go inside, my bus turned around the corner and splashed water all over me. The bus driver wouldn't let me on the bus because I was soaking wet and I would "mess up the seats". FML

by soaked / 08/31/2009 at 9:05am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation

Today, I was on a 12 hour trans-Atlantic flight overseas. I asked the flight attendant where this rancid smell was coming from. The guy sitting next to me started laughing, saying, "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour 1 of the flight. FML

by whatsmccraken / 09/10/2009 at 8:37am / Taiwan (T'ai-wan) / Transportation

Today, my friend and I drove three hours to attend a U2 concert. We had been psyched about the tickets for weeks because they were awesome seats (my early Christmas present). After a long drive, we get to the venue and I realize in horror that I left tickets at home, on my desk, three hours away. FML

by sostupid / 10/10/2009 at 3:22pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I parked my convertible in the 5 minute bay at the post office. When I came back out I noticed a bum in the front seat pretending to drive it. After shouting at him and pulling him out, he stumbled off. I was then slapped with a ticket for being parked longer than 5 minutes. FML

by John / 11/15/2009 at 1:08am / Australia (Queensland) / Transportation

Today, I had an appointment with a psychotherapist. I was feeling very depressed and was telling her how I felt no one cared about me. Her phone rang and she left me mid-sentence to take a call about her new BMW. FML

by troubled / 11/04/2009 at 12:10am / United States (California) / Health

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

by parched / 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm / United States (Indiana) / Money

Today, I finished up my physics project. I had to make some thing out of toothpicks and glue that will keep an egg from breaking when dropped 20 feet. It took me 10 hours to make it, but only took my dad 10 seconds to step on it and break it. It's due tomorrow. FML

by Physics fail. / 11/11/2009 at 2:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it was supposed to be payday. Instead, it was the day I found out that, for two weeks, I have been volunteering for Habitat for Humanity, and am not actually employed by a construction company. FML

by Masonlee89 / 11/20/2009 at 10:59pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was finally able to hang out with a girl I really liked at a party. We had a great time and spent hours together. When I leaned in for a kiss at the end of the night, she stopped me and said that "you're a great guy, but we can't go out because you'll be bad for my social reputation." FML

by Jason / 11/22/2009 at 10:11am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, I was at a dinner with my dad's girlfriend's family. I met this guy who I found kind of cute and tried to talk to him a couple times. To avoid talking to me he started playing his PSP. I could see the screen perfectly and the PSP was clearly off. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2009 at 11:43am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was dumped at the surprise party I threw for my boyfriend. FML

by TanjinaRubbaiyat / 01/15/2010 at 3:49am / Bangladesh (Dhaka) / Love

Today, I lost my job because I was doing my work too quickly, getting too much done and the supervisor was afraid I was bored. I have only been here for 3 weeks and already had the best stats on the team. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2010 at 9:33pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was in my drama class and I was standing behind the curtains. My friend accidentally bumped me into the bin that was hidden behind the curtain. Everyone heard me fall and they opened the curtains. My butt was stuck in it and my knees were in front of my face. No one helped. FML

by JD / 02/05/2010 at 8:20pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous