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Today, while discussing my grades with my mother, she told me that when she was my age she was dumb but hardworking, and my dad was lazy but very smart. She then added, "You managed to get the worst out of each of us." FML

#21372077
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28482) - you deserved it (3150)

On 03/10/2015 at 8:19pm - misc - by Daughter of the year - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, I walked 20 minutes in rain, winds that almost knocked me over, and face-fulls of stinging hailstones. Less than a minute after I finally got inside, the weather cleared up, the sun came out, and a rainbow appeared. FML

#21367104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31243) - you deserved it (2889)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:41am - misc - by Banana_Lord - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28529) - you deserved it (3771)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the dentist for the first time in years. His first comment upon inspecting my teeth: "Meth. Hell of a drug." FML

#21395729
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27871) - you deserved it (10051)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

#21430214
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24428) - you deserved it (4490)

On 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm - health - by oh no (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got yelled at for 'letting' my muddy dog jump on my cousin's wedding dress as she was getting ready. I don't own a dog and haven't since I was a kid. FML

#21404425
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31015) - you deserved it (2001)

On 05/04/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by FMe - United Kingdom

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

#21448563
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26106) - you deserved it (3211)

On 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm - misc - by Oopsie - United States (Vermont)

Today, my husband let my 8-year-old twins play with handcuffs. I thought my husband was pretending he had lost the key but after 4 hours, he walked in with his head down and said, "I've made a terrible mistake honey." FML

#21429657
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25225) - you deserved it (2068)

On 06/21/2015 at 5:37pm - kids - by hfs palm - United States

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

#21444515
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27126) - you deserved it (7297)

On 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by Marika - United States (California)

Today, I used my Christmas holiday time to open up a load of old letters. There were a lot of bills, of course, but there was also a note telling me that I'm due for a tax inspection. Merry F*ing Christmas! FML

#607
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14679) - you deserved it (4706)

On 12/27/2008 at 3:23am - misc - by TodX - Sent from mobile version

Today, I committed to babysitting on Valentine's Day not because I needed the money, but because I just got dumped. FML

#11684
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22628) - you deserved it (2316)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by alone (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofas to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML

#6610013
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21570) - you deserved it (5749)

On 12/05/2009 at 12:29am - money - by Harry (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I took my best friend to an 80's party. She drank too much and ended up puking all over the interior and exterior of my car as well as inside my right legwarmer on the 30 mile trip back home. FML

#8293318
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21002) - you deserved it (4306)

On 02/15/2010 at 9:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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