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Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML

#20972428
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39383) - you deserved it (3786)

On 11/27/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by paranoid neighborhood - United States (Florida)

Today, my fiancé left me waiting at the train station for two and a half hours because he offered his ex-girlfriend a lift to her friends wedding that was a few cities away. I normally wouldn't have minded, but I'm 6 months pregnant and it was pouring with rain. FML

Today, during school, I passed out in the lunch line and hit my head on the metal rail as I fell. Rather than helping or expressing concern at all, my friends simply left my unconscious body on the floor. Why? They had to get to the lasagna before the cafeteria ran out of it. FML

Today, I came home to a noise complaint letter taped to my apartment door. I haven't been home in over a month. FML

#20981967
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36196) - you deserved it (2036)

On 12/05/2013 at 6:39pm - misc - by Lulu - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20991879
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36795) - you deserved it (6329)

On 12/14/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by Crystal_Nicole - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got to spend all of my time scrubbing poop off the walls and carpet because my 2-year-old decided he wanted to 'paint mama a picture.' FML

Today, my grandkids went around my house claiming items to inherit. FML

#20984796
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49212) - you deserved it (3680)

On 12/08/2013 at 8:19am - kids - by blah! - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

#20983816
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47210) - you deserved it (5504)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by john doe (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I caught a man standing on my porch, urinating on my house. I called the cops, who informed me that because my porch isn't fenced off, it's not trespassing, and because it's private property not visible from the street, the man wasn't urinating in public. FML

Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

#21004509
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37313) - you deserved it (6546)

On 12/25/2013 at 2:46am - love - by lonely otaku (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me via Facebook. I cared more about the spelling mistakes he made than the actual message. FML

#20994896
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36576) - you deserved it (10547)

On 12/16/2013 at 5:43pm - love - by dana (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my psychotic grandma set fire to our Christmas tree because she refuses to let us celebrate what she calls a twisted pagan holiday. FML

#20992504
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38131) - you deserved it (3562)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:05pm - misc - by take a fucking seat, gran (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized I'm so socially awkward that I can't even talk to Siri without stuttering. FML

#21018050
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40940) - you deserved it (5498)

On 01/05/2014 at 4:59pm - love - by stopstutteringforSiri - United States



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