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Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

#21244527
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37494) - you deserved it (4367)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up to find "Fuck you, Harry" painted on my car. Harry's my neighbour. FML

#21280293
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38511) - you deserved it (2471)

On 10/18/2014 at 3:20am - misc - by Queensland - Australia

Today, it's the last night before a concert. Today is also the day my brother pawned my clarinet for drug money. FML

#21315391
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35220) - you deserved it (2448)

On 12/11/2014 at 12:44am - money - by noshow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

#21332729
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41957) - you deserved it (3661)

On 01/07/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Guam

Today, my girlfriend asked me not to love her so much, so she doesn't have to try so hard to match my love for her. What the fuck? FML

#21338940
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30553) - you deserved it (9114)

On 01/17/2015 at 2:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, cops showed up at my house looking for an ex neighbor. It would be all cool if before knocking they didn't politely wait in front of my window listening me and my boyfriend having sex for half an hour. FML

#21418507
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32232) - you deserved it (3221)

On 05/31/2015 at 10:19am - intimacy - by bonsai_girl - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

Today, while working at a children's toy store, a woman walked in, looked around a bit, then asked if we sell dildos. FML

#21456680
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24548) - you deserved it (1667)

On 08/16/2015 at 11:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, an old lady wearing a low-cut shirt with no bra underneath came into my line with some groceries. At some point while bagging her groceries, her wrinkled breast slipped out of her shirt. She didn't even notice. I wish to fuck I could unsee this. FML

#21432649
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28174) - you deserved it (2139)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was sitting on the bus on my commute to work, when I nodded off on the charming young man next to me. Something cold and wet touched me, and I looked down to see a small pool of my saliva collecting on my chest. The man thought this was hilarious. FML

#450
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22694) - you deserved it (4985)

On 12/04/2008 at 10:45pm - misc - by Kerlane - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to do a load of laundry. Two minutes into the cycle, I realized that I left my iPod in my sweatpants pocket. The washing machine door locks automatically and cannot be opened until the 40-minute cycle is up. FML

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. In order to make a good impression I was as polite as possible and tried to be as engaging as I could. Near the end of dinner my girlfriend's mom says, "I liked your old boyfriend better." FML

#785377
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59892) - you deserved it (3169)

On 04/03/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by str3tch - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in my front yard. As I stormed off in my dramatic exit, I realized I had locked myself outside. I had to ask my now ex-boyfriend to borrow his phone so I could call my mom. FML

#3627701
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39289) - you deserved it (9222)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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