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Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40331) - you deserved it (4415)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41578) - you deserved it (6438)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I committed to babysitting on Valentine's Day not because I needed the money, but because I just got dumped. FML

#11684
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22335) - you deserved it (2299)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by alone (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, someone commented on my mother's memorial page on my blog. It said "u need too get over it bitch" and "ur mum was a wh0re". I looked up the IP address and found the comment was posted from my own wifi. The only other person who lives in my house is my girlfriend. FML

#21297662
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41993) - you deserved it (3164)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland)

Today, I spilled a glass of iced tea all over my desk. It trickled down the wall and fried an extension cord. FML

#8615940
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15764) - you deserved it (8340)

On 02/24/2010 at 2:43pm - misc - by dumbbass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was wearing my favorite silk sweater, one I actually paid full price for. I sat down in my desk chair to work, and when I tried to get up I felt a strange pull. A corner of my sweater is still stuck in the screw at the back of the chair, the rest is in the trash. FML

#8736997
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18620) - you deserved it (3096)

On 03/01/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by dangit (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to Uni. I woke up at six and got to the station as the train was leaving. I was congratulating myself on my brilliant skill when, as we passed the carpark, I saw I had left my headlights on. It later cost more for the lead to jump start my car than it would have to drive to Uni myself. FML

#8580387
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14993) - you deserved it (5994)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by car_FAILure (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my roommate and I finally went to the DMV to transfer our vehicle ownership title to our names. On our way out, we joked that we were now responsible for any violations involving our car. We came back to a $35 parking ticket. FML

#9040800
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5932) - you deserved it (19049)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by loki (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finished working a week's overtime managing admin, stock, finances, and three members of staff. I realised that despite all my extra work, I actually earn less per hour than the students who only work on the weekends. FML

#14600625
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21026) - you deserved it (2358)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:30pm - work - by ovawerkrd - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while I was out of the office, I'd left my phone charging inside. My boss informed me that since I am clearly running up her electricity bill, it will be deducted out of my already nearly non existent paycheck. FML

#14473900
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22043) - you deserved it (3825)

On 01/05/2011 at 11:41am - work - by x_udontknowme_x (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that one of my university flatmates arrived early for Freshers Week, and had a party which involved the place being trashed. I'm going to lose some of my deposit for damage caused before I even arrived. FML

#17759197
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20819) - you deserved it (1843)

On 09/16/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by Authentik8 (man) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

Today, I found out that my apartment complex has no rules against having charcoal grills on the porch. So did the guy who lives below me. FML

#19449205
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16131) - you deserved it (2266)

On 04/11/2012 at 11:06am - misc - by Sios (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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