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Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

#20751029
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36106) - you deserved it (3375)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by smh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I tried to lift my girlfriend and spin her around like in a Rom-Com. I started the spin, then heard a pop. The pain caused me to yelp and fall to the floor, dropping her on top of me. I dislocated my kneecap trying to be romantic. She only weighs about 90 lbs. FML

#20723365
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46012) - you deserved it (11862)

On 06/13/2013 at 11:13am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my estranged father, who is a cop, decided to show up to my 17th birthday party. He immediately began arresting people for underage drinking. Way to mend fences, dad. FML

#20723133
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45477) - you deserved it (23210)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:16am - misc - by fuckyouverymuch (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was visiting my childhood home, and I checked out my old treehouse. A family of skunks had made it their home, and I was promptly sprayed upon entering. FML

#20733333
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37607) - you deserved it (6088)

On 06/18/2013 at 2:00pm - animals - by skunked - United States (California)

Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML

#20773891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39661) - you deserved it (12123)

On 07/10/2013 at 4:58am - animals - by kutekittykatz (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

#20757330
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34731) - you deserved it (4229)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:49am - work - by Neveragain (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while driving during rush hour, I was singing so loudly that some jackass in the car next to me felt he should get my attention by throwing a wadded-up McDonald's bag through my open window, hitting me in the face with it, and telling me to shut up. FML

#20749580
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24677) - you deserved it (44951)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by authorx - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

#20784969
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48230) - you deserved it (4229)

On 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the doctor told my husband that he is infertile due to slow sperm. As if this is not upsetting enough, my husband blames it on me. According to him, his sperm doesn't get 'aroused' because I'm not sexy enough. FML

#20800901
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58751) - you deserved it (5038)

On 07/24/2013 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Iamdisappointed (woman) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)

Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML

#20754112
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51060) - you deserved it (6094)

On 06/29/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my step-dad tried to talk me into getting plastic surgery. His reasoning: "Let's face it, 28 and single? Look, I know your mum gave you shitty genes, but that's no excuse to avoid fixing your face, honey." FML

#20765605
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40968) - you deserved it (2611)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:37pm - misc - by buttuglyforeveralone :( (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to: "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML

#20803390
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57731) - you deserved it (6882)

On 07/25/2013 at 7:20pm - love - by sucksatlove (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML

#20762512
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47286) - you deserved it (3063)

On 07/03/2013 at 10:40pm - animals - by nakedweddingday (woman) - United States (California)



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