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Today, my boss came around to my way of thinking. He called our customers a "bunch of assholes" and to kick them out if they gave me trouble. When a lady began yelling at me for "setting the damn prices too high" I told her to leave. My boss soon bitched me out for being unprofessional. FML

#20941693
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40002) - you deserved it (7438)

On 11/01/2013 at 6:47pm - work - by choke on a dick, sir (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I took my 13 year old fishing off the pier for dogfish. The only thing he caught was a piece of my ear. FML

#20952293
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41026) - you deserved it (4172)

On 11/10/2013 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, marks my third day of school being closed due to snow. One, and only one, of the teachers has decided that we have to do work online in the meantime. I just so happen to be in three of his classes. FML

#20987643
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43862) - you deserved it (4638)

On 12/10/2013 at 12:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

#20982484
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45682) - you deserved it (17463)

On 12/06/2013 at 2:08am - money - by butterfingers - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

#21028790
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45419) - you deserved it (5912)

On 01/15/2014 at 2:22pm - misc - by coop42 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my mom that my boyfriend had broken up with me. She was more upset about it than I was. She actually almost cried. FML

#21076568
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40763) - you deserved it (4103)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:13am - love - by Chilly (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I left for work. Halfway to my car, my neighbour's son jumped out and emptied a bucket of water all over me. The little pissant screamed with laughter and ran back to his house. His mum's reaction was essentially "kids will be kids" and slamming the door on me. FML

#21074103
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43602) - you deserved it (3539)

On 02/28/2014 at 3:01pm - kids - by HeMayHaveSomeIssues (man) - Denmark

Today, my brother got the same cologne as the guy I've been seeing for a while. Every time I'm with my brother I think about him, and every time I'm with him I think about my brother. FML

#21259922
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42132) - you deserved it (4352)

On 09/17/2014 at 7:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out my wife named our son after her ex-lover. FML

#21260166
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42063) - you deserved it (3230)

On 09/17/2014 at 6:10pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I replied to a party invite. I thought I was only replying to the hostess, who's a close friend, so added a P. S. about a recent sex toy purchase I'd made and how rubbish it had been. I only realised after pressing "Send" that I'd selected "Reply All". FML

#21271313
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27441) - you deserved it (39395)

On 10/05/2014 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while on my driving test, the guy told me to pull over and do a U-turn. A few minutes later, he asked me to do another one. After the test, he said I'd failed because the second U-turn was illegal, and I should have refused to comply. I didn't know they're even allowed do that. FML

#21340454
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38247) - you deserved it (5272)

On 01/19/2015 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I strained so hard trying to take a crap that I broke a blood vessel in my eye. FML

#21414271
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26947) - you deserved it (5729)

On 05/23/2015 at 12:38am - misc - by Strainer - United States (California)

Today, my boss confided in me that when a gay person visits his house, he discreetly follows them around and cleans anything they touched and everywhere they sat with disinfectant wipes. I've worked for him for 7 years but he doesn't know I'm gay. FML

#21430685
116 comments


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