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Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML

#20579242
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27325) - you deserved it (5132)

On 04/07/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by DJ (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I got all dressed up, in high heels and a sparkly dress, to sit in the library for most of the night so that my roommate and his friends would believe that I have a social life. FML

#20585552
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33054) - you deserved it (11208)

On 04/11/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by InNeedOfFriends (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. A few hours later, we discovered he's highly allergic to my Summer's Eve soap. He looks like he's been attacked by bees. Yay for losing my v-card. FML

#20597351
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44108) - you deserved it (6995)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML

#20634407
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49472) - you deserved it (4138)

On 05/01/2013 at 6:30am - money - by Alexman1985 -

Today, I decided I would try this feature on my banking app which lets me deposit checks by sending a picture of it. The instructions say to rip the check after depositing. The deposit didn't work and now I've got a ripped up paycheck. FML

#20650425
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22306) - you deserved it (46039)

On 05/08/2013 at 6:21pm - money - by Checkless chick - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he says I need to learn how to be happy without relying on him. I'm not a clinger, I'm just unhappy because my dad recently passed away, my best friend turned on me, and I lost out on the exchange program of my dreams. FML

#20625067
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53622) - you deserved it (3494)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML

#20628307
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40226) - you deserved it (11294)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by shameless - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 15-year-old brother got busted for selling pills at school. The officer said they were reddish pink, so we searched the house for that kind of pill. Turns out it was my dog's medicine from over 4 years ago. FML

#20620041
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41041) - you deserved it (3855)

On 04/25/2013 at 12:54am - kids - by kkt - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I went to the bathroom and after I washed my hands, I took a Q-tip out of the carton to clean my ears. When I reached for a second one, I noticed that every Q-tip in the carton was actually already used. FML

#20643700
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42691) - you deserved it (7196)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:10pm - health - by grossed out - United States (Illinois)

Today, the vet sent me an email wishing my kitten a happy 2nd birthday. My cat died last year. FML

#20686886
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41215) - you deserved it (3398)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:33am - animals - by Tiber46 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at dance rehearsal. As a male dancer I like to keep the fact that I dance a secret because of the stupid stereotypes male dancers have. This plan was quickly shot down when I discovered I was performing at my school. FML

#20639678
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36881) - you deserved it (5130)

On 05/03/2013 at 8:39pm - misc - by DeActivated (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my daughter posted a beautiful, touching status on my Facebook wall for Mother's Day. It wasn't so touching that she'd just copied and pasted the one I wrote for her grandmother and sent it back to me, unedited. FML

#20658557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38478) - you deserved it (3153)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:21pm - love - by mothers (woman) - United States

Today, I let my dad put my dollar in the slot machine for me because I'm not old enough to gamble. I won $200 but he kept it because he "put the dollar in the slot machine." FML

#20650676
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47376) - you deserved it (9077)

On 05/08/2013 at 8:07pm - money - by anonymous - United States (Wyoming)



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