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Today, I let my friend bleach my hair, which resulted in it falling out in clumps. I spent $150 at the beauty salon fixing it and cutting most of it off. I sent the pictures of my new hair to my friends, and I got the same reply from each and every one of them: "That better be a wig." FML

#20463998
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14505) - you deserved it (18913)

On 01/17/2013 at 2:53am - misc - by goodlord12 (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, the new manager at my workplace left early in a panic, exclaiming, "My grandma had an accident! I need to see if she's okay!" I was left in charge of the bar once again. This is the sixth time this week his grandma has had an "accident". FML

#20490841
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22061) - you deserved it (1522)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML

#20480007
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21976) - you deserved it (7752)

On 01/26/2013 at 4:51pm - misc - by go snope yourself (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary. I had cooked him a romantic meal and we were planning on eating it in front of the fire. This would have gone great had I not forgotten to unblock the chimney. My entire basement filled with smoke and didn't clear for three hours. FML

#20487007
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (23793)

On 01/30/2013 at 11:02pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML

#20492659
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24570) - you deserved it (2773)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

#20512214
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8673) - you deserved it (24761)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:11pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML

#20512675
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24020) - you deserved it (5589)

On 02/18/2013 at 8:49pm - work - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States

Today, I was in bed when I rolled over and saw a hand right beside my head. I freaked out and nearly peed myself, just to realize that it was the huggable heart pillow my boyfriend had given to me on Valentine's Day. FML

#20524057
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9692) - you deserved it (14587)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by girlymae (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, after spending almost an hour in the dentist's waiting room, watching other people get called in for their appointments, I finally lost my patience and asked the receptionist what was taking so long. I'd forgotten to sign in. FML

#20528161
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7568) - you deserved it (31749)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:32pm - misc - by oops (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I finally built up the courage to quit my job. I waited an hour to speak to the boss; I finally sat down with her, and she told me I had to be let go because I'm not "reliable enough." The only time I missed work was when I had the stomach flu. I was fired before I could even quit. FML

#20554644
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28392) - you deserved it (2827)

On 03/22/2013 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I received a chain-mail text that vividly described what "Tanya" would do to me in my sleep if I didn't forward it on. I'm so paranoid that I did just that. I also realized that accidentally forwarding such things to your boss can get you fired. FML

#20526851
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8686) - you deserved it (41669)

On 03/01/2013 at 11:35am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML

#20543527
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36792) - you deserved it (9272)

On 03/14/2013 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, for my birthday, the only "gift" my parents gave me was the gift of choice: I got to choose which one of them I'll be living with after their upcoming divorce. This was the first time I'd heard anything about a divorce. FML

#20569388
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32453) - you deserved it (1812)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:03am - misc - by HappyBirthdayISuppose (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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