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Today, I was at the airport and I offered to help an elderly man carry his golf clubs. Apparently, I sounded sarcastic and condescending, because he started screaming at me about etiquette and manners in front of the entire airport. FML

#19879557
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (1982)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by JDBigDawg - United States (California)

Today, an incredibly rude woman came in for a hairdressing appointment. I had to put up with being yelled at and called a "clumsy bitch," a "pleb," and other insults for almost half an hour. When I finally managed to finish her hair, instead of tipping me, she spat at my feet and stormed out. FML

#20093857
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25129) - you deserved it (1978)

On 09/29/2012 at 4:34pm - misc - by scumdresser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that even though your brother agrees to watch your dogs for a week, it does not mean that he will pick up after them. Apparently, it's okay to leave piss and shit all over the deck and floors because they're not his dogs and he shouldn't have to clean up their messes. FML

#20120904
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20339) - you deserved it (3644)

On 10/17/2012 at 11:53am - animals - by JennyPenny (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my dormant eczema decided to come back with a vengeance - on my scrotum. I work in an open office and can't scratch unless I repeatedly run into the restroom. FML

#20058701
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18972) - you deserved it (1399)

On 09/05/2012 at 10:06am - health - by needtoscratch (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, some kid decided to pee in the kids' play area at work. Because I was the shortest employee working at the time, I got to climb through the area to mop it up, while all the kids pointed and laughed at me. FML

#20089585
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18538) - you deserved it (1466)

On 09/26/2012 at 1:37pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my sister-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer. My mother then confided in me that she suspected it was a prank to get more money from our family. FML

#20125135
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21379) - you deserved it (1409)

On 10/20/2012 at 11:10am - misc - by iamsolid - United States

Today, I tagged along with some friends to a party in the woods. Halfway into the night, a party-goer's boyfriend got extremely drunk and violent, causing the others to panic and drive away in the two cars we pooled in. My best friend and I had to run all the way back home on foot. FML

#20134435
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17739) - you deserved it (3628)

On 10/26/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by Miss Spasticator (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally got to attend the concert I have been anticipating for weeks. The band was great. The drunk guy sitting behind me yelling profanity and out of tune lyrics in my ear throughout the entire show, however, was not. FML

#20144110
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18195) - you deserved it (1826)

On 11/02/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by annoyed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I paid a locksmith $100 after I locked myself out of my apartment. All he did was hit it, and it flung open. It wasn't locked, it'd just got stuck. FML

#20153207
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9021) - you deserved it (19907)

On 11/07/2012 at 10:00am - money - by stuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm at work on a construction site for a high rise building, on the 12th floor today. I've developed a severe case of the runs, causing me to need to rush to the nearest toilet periodically. Luckily for me it's conveniently located on the ground floor. FML

#20154818
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19906) - you deserved it (1395)

On 11/08/2012 at 9:36am - health - by bob the builder - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22934) - you deserved it (45194) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML

#20438667
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34797) - you deserved it (3133)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:59pm - love - by great. -

Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML

#20467403
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31769) - you deserved it (6734)

On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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