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Today, I woke up in my hospital bed after having knee surgery, on the wrong knee. FML

#20986378
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66270) - you deserved it (3591)

On 12/09/2013 at 2:17pm - health - by knee pain - United States

Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML

#20989169
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36271) - you deserved it (2836)

On 12/11/2013 at 5:25pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Luxembourg

Today, I had to explain to half of my class that yes, my birthday is on the same day as Hitler's, but no, it does not make me a Nazi. FML

#20981261
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40457) - you deserved it (2700)

On 12/05/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by happy birthday to me (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I finally watched Toy Story 3; I ended up crying when the toys almost die. After the movie, my girlfriend broke up with me because I embarrassed her. FML

#20982712
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43277) - you deserved it (10913)

On 12/06/2013 at 11:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML

#20993307
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42579) - you deserved it (6197)

On 12/15/2013 at 11:58am - animals - by Cat Piss - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML

#20990683
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47044) - you deserved it (2982)

On 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by justin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48873) - you deserved it (4479)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided to light a lantern and watch it fly with my girlfriend after midnight. The neighbor's tree caught fire. FML

#21012276
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36410) - you deserved it (12013)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:17am - misc - by claubea11 - Puerto Rico

Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML

#21001381
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39235) - you deserved it (9306)

On 12/22/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

Today, a guy punched me in the subway for staring at his girlfriend. I had dark glasses on, and was fast asleep. FML

#21002133
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42778) - you deserved it (3196)

On 12/23/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by GogglesGoggles - United States

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51653) - you deserved it (14895)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sang "happy birthday" to my best friend. Sadly, it was while waitressing at work, where they were having a celebration I hadn't been invited to in the first place. FML

#21024621
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50450) - you deserved it (3794)

On 01/11/2014 at 3:26pm - misc - by left out - United States (Ohio)

Today, I watched "Time of the Doctor" and I'm pretty sure my love of Doctor Who slithered out through my ear and shamefully lodged itself in the darkest corner of the room, crying. FML

#21005939
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30878) - you deserved it (7937)

On 12/26/2013 at 7:08am - love - by anon - Australia



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