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Today, after a nap, I went to scratch my eye and felt what I presumed to be a clump of mascara on my eyelash. I didn't wear mascara today. It was a tick. FML

#2213407
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58287) - you deserved it (3698)

On 05/23/2009 at 3:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I discovered in my house a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer except me. FML

#9673
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30730) - you deserved it (8029)

On 02/05/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Tori (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mum and I were walking down a road where we met an old neighbour who recently got divorced. Her son who we hadn't seen for about 10 years was with her and he looked very handsome. I said, "oh wow ! your son has grown up so much !" The woman replied, "this is my boyfriend." FML

#1218205
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46648) - you deserved it (8716)

On 04/22/2009 at 10:09am - misc - by Anonymous - Hong Kong

Today, I was saying goodbye to my boyfriend before I got on my bus. As I turned to get on, the door closed on my face. I knocked on the door. The driver looked at me, and while still staring at me, drove off. FML

#6235277
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28348) - you deserved it (5183)

On 11/09/2009 at 9:20pm - misc - by Tee (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my family and I are driving down to France and it's going to take 4 hours. If that wasn't bad enough, my mum decides that she is going to listen to the CD my sister bought her for Christmas on repeat for the whole journey. It's Lady Gaga. FML

#6953630
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37329) - you deserved it (9021)

On 12/26/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by OhGodKillMeNow (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, it hit me that my dad didn't cry when I moved out, he did so only when I came back later to pick up my cat. FML

#6761317
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27878) - you deserved it (3108)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:50am - animals - by number2 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML

#8082566
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27464) - you deserved it (4322)

On 02/10/2010 at 6:47am - love - by kstaa - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my grandfather died. The last thing he said to me was "You smell awful." I work in a fish store. FML

#11377747
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45173) - you deserved it (5038)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:49am - misc - by Mangler (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I found out that my friend makes more money than I do. She's a high school dropout and working at a retail job at the mall. I went to college for four years to get my job. FML

#14450776
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32831) - you deserved it (4941)

On 01/03/2011 at 12:51pm - love - by This_Is_Me1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the fat sweaty guy at my job frequently uses my rub-on deodorant and puts it back in my drawer after he's done. FML

#14209126
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34494) - you deserved it (3040)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:27am - work - by anonymous -

Today, I brought a cupcake to school for my friend's birthday. After taking one bite, she exclaimed that it was the worst thing she had ever tasted and that we should sue the store that I bought it from. I baked it myself. FML

#14113537
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26775) - you deserved it (5200)

On 12/06/2010 at 10:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was lying on the sofa when the phone rang. I jumped up to answer in time. I knocked over my laptop, and kicked my guitar into a glass causing it to smash. It was a wrong number. FML

#14534217
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23188) - you deserved it (11329)

On 01/10/2011 at 3:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Isle of Man

Today, I was prescribed anti-anxiety medication due to the high level of stress that I experience at my job. Unfortunately, I cannot afford the medication because I do not make enough money at said job. FML

#15658999
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33901) - you deserved it (4119)

On 04/05/2011 at 11:26pm - money - by Username -



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