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Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML

#20668938
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42537) - you deserved it (5249)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by jessinono (woman) - United States

Today, my parents told me they're glad I'm an "ugly nerd" because they don't have to worry about me getting into trouble or having a teen pregnancy. FML

#20686197
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49525) - you deserved it (4292)

On 05/25/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by uglynerd (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

#20748338
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40384) - you deserved it (7792)

On 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML

#20693212
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52346) - you deserved it (3620)

On 05/29/2013 at 2:29pm - misc - by WTFruits - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML

#20706851
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57412) - you deserved it (3626)

On 06/05/2013 at 1:02am - love - by Justme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML

#20716353
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (7215)

On 06/09/2013 at 9:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to walk home in the rain because my mom didn't want to get her new car wet. FML

#20705347
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56954) - you deserved it (3660)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40550) - you deserved it (5621)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20699633
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48009) - you deserved it (4027)

On 06/01/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got mugged on the way to my 21st birthday party at a bar. I begged the thug to at least throw me my ID, only to have him laugh and run away singing "happy birthday". FML

#20711068
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56194) - you deserved it (3547)

On 06/07/2013 at 1:14am - money - by ididntevendrinkthatnight - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I talked about our past relationships. He said he broke up with his last girlfriend because she was "too smart" for him, and that he felt better being with someone who "doesn't have too many lights on upstairs, if you know what I mean." FML

#20729746
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49650) - you deserved it (5731)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by ... (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, my husband and I came clean to his overbearing parents about our private wedding. It started with them accusing him of making rash decisions, and somehow descended into an argument amongst themselves that ended with his mom deciding to divorce his dad. FML

#20786569
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49509) - you deserved it (4147)

On 07/16/2013 at 4:00pm - love - by .__. (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64375) - you deserved it (3454)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



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