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Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML

by ElhonnaDS / 05/20/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the airport when I saw a woman drop her bags and run to her husband. Thinking that someone might steal them, I picked up her bags and brought them over to her. She thanked me by slapping me, calling me a bitch and calling security. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2013 at 8:13pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got shut in the walk-in freezer at work. I started banging on the door. My boss wouldn't come and open it because she didn't "play games". She thought I was kidding. FML

by anonymous / 07/02/2013 at 5:08pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

by Jienaf / 09/17/2013 at 4:26am / Malta / Work

Today, playing soccer, I jumped up to make a header and clear the ball away from our goal. I got the ball but some guy kicked me in the face. I was taken off. All the parents were horrified, saying how badly my nose must have broken. Turns out my nose was fine. That's just how my nose looks. FML

by supras / 12/03/2013 at 9:03pm / United Kingdom (Luton) / Health

Today, I saw some servicemen sitting outside a café, and I went over to thank them for their service. They waited till after I was done shaking their hands before they told me they were just actors on their lunch break. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2013 at 3:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML

by pissed / 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm / United States / Money

Today, once again I was told I looked a bit like Lindsay Lohan. I can't figure out if they mean the young, good looking one, or the current cracked out rehab version. FML

by Jen__ / 03/22/2014 at 3:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I looked at my bank balance. It read $1.23. That's higher than it usually is. FML

by amused / 06/23/2014 at 5:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Money

Today, I was helping out at my church. At lunchtime, a really cute guy my age walked over and told me I was pretty. I was flattered, until I turned around and saw his annoyed buddies handing him several dollar bills. FML

by what people do for money / 07/18/2014 at 12:45pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I saw my boyfriend wiping his nose with his hand and then using the snot to gel back his hair. FML

by danceinconverse / 09/23/2014 at 2:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

by ThatNewCarSmell / 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a quickie in the car. We had left a window open so it wasn't too hot, and I was holding onto the edge of the window, fingers hanging over. In the midst of it all, my boyfriend managed to close the window by hitting the button. My finger is broken. FML

by manymisfortunes / 10/04/2014 at 1:43am / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy