Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I pulled my motorcycle into a wheelie when my crush drove by. She was the one who drove me to the hospital when I went over backward. FML

#20878799
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19796) - you deserved it (49511)

On 09/12/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by Robert - United States (Michigan)

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39772) - you deserved it (3491)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a customer threatened to come back later and shoot the whole place up. Why? I didn't give him a discount on his beer. My boss's reaction when I called the police: "Why didn't you give him the discount?!" Last week he bitched me out for letting a girl off for being a few cents short on hers. FML

#20983086
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42890) - you deserved it (3085)

On 12/06/2013 at 6:37pm - work - by eat my fucking ass, boss (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

#21150544
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48422) - you deserved it (3910)

On 05/24/2014 at 7:57pm - misc - by Congrats to me - United States (Ohio)

Today, I lost my dog while hiking. After searching the trails for an hour and a half, he was by the car. FML

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28969) - you deserved it (6342)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got an Economics test back from my professor. I got a 17/20. I looked it over and noticed one of the questions was completely right. I checked the textbook he made and the answer was the same. I asked him why it was wrong, and he responded with, "I guess I changed my mind." FML

#21260926
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38389) - you deserved it (2483)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:44pm - misc - by badprofessor - United States (New York)

Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML

#21286665
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30741) - you deserved it (5570)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:00pm - health - by Discipl (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught my little sister taking a selfie in the mirror with a fake nose piercing, peace sign, and a duck face. She's 12. FML

#21251377
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40572) - you deserved it (3936)

On 09/03/2014 at 7:35pm - kids - by MusicLover18 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

#21268936
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19635) - you deserved it (40324)

On 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm - misc - by ThatNewCarSmell (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was home alone and tried to make some popcorn so I could watch a movie. Thirty minutes later, my parents came home and found me talking to the firemen. FML

#21398409
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27259) - you deserved it (8033)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:43am - misc - by almost_a_pro - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, in order to look nice for a date, I tried the new blue mouthwash that turns plaque blue so you know where to brush. I couldn't get all the blue. FML

#1986687
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17558) - you deserved it (43611)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Ricky (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was going to propose. Since he was really nervous, he decided to have a couple of drinks to loosen up. He ended up throwing up and passing out before he could get down on one knee. FML

#1358275
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52569) - you deserved it (4474)

On 04/26/2009 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: