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Today, just three days into a much-needed vacation, my 5-year-old daughter has come down with chickenpox. FML

#19506511
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21808) - you deserved it (2592)

On 04/21/2012 at 3:26pm - kids - by Lorena - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I traveled by plane for the first time. Once in the air, I was absolutely terrorized by the whole experience. Luckily, they had free booze on board, so I necked some to steady my nerves. Unfortunately, the vodka mixed with air turbulence made me spurt some vomit into my lap. FML

#19494854
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8215) - you deserved it (20436)

On 04/19/2012 at 8:37am - health - by Burp (woman) - United States

Today, I fell asleep on the couch while babysitting. When the kids' parents came home, they made fake crying noises to see if I would wake up. I slept like a baby, and by the time they finally roused me, I'd left a nice drool stain on the armrest. FML

#19385334
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6135) - you deserved it (28741)

On 03/31/2012 at 10:52pm - misc - by whatnow - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had my eyebrows waxed for my senior pictures. After manhandling me, the cosmetologist managed to "accidentally" take my whole eyebrow off. It looks like I'll be remembered forevermore as the girl with one eyebrow. FML

#19987412
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20582) - you deserved it (2764)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:46pm - misc - by booo - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at a wedding. After videotaping the ceremony for a few minutes, my memory was full. I went to delete another video. I accidentally played the loudest video I had. No one was looking at the bride or groom anymore. FML

#19722666
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18807) - you deserved it (8487)

On 06/02/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by dream1334 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'm so broke, I asked my parents if they'd pay for me to go to the eye doctor and consider it my Christmas present. FML

#20149436
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21792) - you deserved it (1943)

On 11/05/2012 at 8:01pm - money - by EB - United States

Today, I was driving home on the highway with my wife and her parents. As I overtook another car, a rock got kicked up into our windshield. My wife screamed about the crack it created, while my mother-in-law goaded her on and mocked my "piss-poor driving." FML

#20085361
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16964) - you deserved it (1687)

On 09/23/2012 at 5:05pm - misc - by future MIL slasher (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my dad was helping my fiancé and me move. On the way, someone sideswiped the trailer. When the police came, we found my dad had a suspended license, no insurance, and a broken tail light. No one else could drive a manual, so we were stuck in a parking lot for 3 hours. Thanks, dad. FML

#19882895
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16819) - you deserved it (4973)

On 07/02/2012 at 9:20pm - misc - by thanksdad (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was trying to put some new curtains up. I couldn't make sense of the instructions, so I decided to wing it. I spent a frustrating half hour fighting with it, and just seconds after I succeeded, the curtain rod gave way and slammed straight onto my head. FML

#19867617
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11818) - you deserved it (15081)

On 06/29/2012 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, after having taken hormone tablets to try to increase my cup size, I realized that I've basically reversed my menopause. FML

#19975577
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5055) - you deserved it (28504)

On 07/22/2012 at 3:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband was planning on getting me my favorite movie as an anniversary present; I ended up buying it. He had to give me the money and leave because he is severely arachnophobic and couldn't even pick up the box. I have to hide the movie for fear of it being destroyed. Again. FML

#20134119
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14811) - you deserved it (3676)

On 10/26/2012 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, the gas company came to connect our stove for free. While here, they broke our hot water heater, shut it off, and issued us a hazard notice. We can fix it, but they won't be able to come back for another two weeks to turn the gas back on. We don't have any hot water until then. FML

#20072391
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19442) - you deserved it (1410)

On 09/15/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my mom talking on the phone with my sister about how much they hate my fiancé. My wedding is in two weeks and my family has been pretending to like my future husband for three years. FML

#20148569
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19920) - you deserved it (1688)

On 11/05/2012 at 6:36am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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