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Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML

#20736762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48811) - you deserved it (3150)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:35am - money - by what_the_hell (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, at work, I politely asked a patron to be quieter; I was hit in the face. I work in a library. FML

#20750109
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40981) - you deserved it (3487)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:02am - work - by rubgy_lover - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was working the drive-through at McDonald's. I greeted a customer with a, "Hi, how are you doing today?" His response: "Better than you." FML

#20795022
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46898) - you deserved it (7780)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:15am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML

#20854260
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45490) - you deserved it (2961)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:28pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

#20762781
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63875) - you deserved it (5536)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML

#20779978
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63602) - you deserved it (3675)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:33pm - love - by fuckingtrollingskankwhoreshitwankcuntfuck (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

#20784153
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50058) - you deserved it (3443)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by leeceetaylor99 - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband bought me a big box of tampons. He claims to know when my period is about to start before I do. Sadly, he's right. FML

#20812881
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47130) - you deserved it (7960)

On 07/31/2013 at 2:31am - love - by RayneWolf13 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

#20805942
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43465) - you deserved it (24565)

On 07/27/2013 at 4:03am - love - by good_aim (man) - United States (California)

Today, while training a new employee, I had to run after a naked guy chasing a hooker at the hotel I work at. I made him go back to his room, while she offered me a good time for 300 bucks. The trainee left and hasn't come back yet. FML

#20849812
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38473) - you deserved it (2729)

On 08/22/2013 at 7:50pm - work - by Awkward - United States

Today, I helped my buddy write a sweet love letter to his girlfriend. After reading it, she dumped him for being an "Edward Cullen wannabe", and when my girlfriend found out, she dumped me for "cheating" on her by writing the letter in the first place. FML

#20802821
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47174) - you deserved it (5510)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by ........................... (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

#20806809
118 comments

Today, I came into the kitchen to see how dinner was coming along. My mother was milling the meat around the skillet with the cat's poop scooper as a spatula. FML

#20856980
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40330) - you deserved it (2517)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)



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