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Today, I got an electric shaver hoping that it would reduce the risk of cutting myself than shaving with a manual one. However, I cut myself opening the plastic package with the shaver inside. FML

#2906195
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34944) - you deserved it (12396)

On 06/15/2009 at 4:51am - misc - by shaverguy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I checked in a group of men from Mexico. I speak just enough Spanish to realize they're discussing my breasts. I have to stand there smiling while checking in three more people. FML

#5618007
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32764) - you deserved it (3543)

On 10/03/2009 at 6:31am - work - by Spanishredhead (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was fired from a job I didn't have. The manager in charge of calling me to tell me if I got the job never called, and never called me back when I left messages. The only time he called me was to fire me for not coming to orientation, which, by the way, he never called to tell me about. FML

#5753501
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39959) - you deserved it (2296)

On 10/10/2009 at 3:23am - work - by superjesse006 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML

#5942193
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12059) - you deserved it (31630)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by Kimberly - Sent from mobile version

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

#6190781
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32643) - you deserved it (2677)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:34am - love - by achoooo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch". I had to wash his plate. FML

#6752832
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31641) - you deserved it (1907)

On 12/14/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by militarywife2b - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was doing a study on homeless people and how they manage to stay alive on the streets. Turns out the one I was studying today was given more money than I make in a week. FML

#6705143
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29660) - you deserved it (2683)

On 12/11/2009 at 2:23am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my dad and I found in my house a water filter that has not been changed in over 20 years. We have been drinking that water that has been going through a filter that had more colors than a rainbow on it. FML

#6949871
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25444) - you deserved it (8673)

On 12/26/2009 at 12:36am - misc - by shithole (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on the phone with my girlfriend. Just as she said "I love you", the credit on my phone runs out. She now thinks that I've purposely hung up on her. She refuses to speak to me until I tell her the real reason I hung up. FML

#13634091
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29221) - you deserved it (3596)

On 10/29/2010 at 12:48am - love - by lovegotmehung (man) - United Kingdom

Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML

#8658326
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24247) - you deserved it (6499)

On 02/26/2010 at 4:09am - misc - by ilovecowboys (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was leaving Wal-Mart with my daughter when a man was speeding the wrong way in the parking lot. To avoid getting hit, I pulled over to the side. He thought I was going the wrong way. He got out cursing and screaming and punched a dent in my hood. FML

#8388229
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27191) - you deserved it (2235)

On 02/17/2010 at 9:46pm - misc - by WTFsalad (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML

#14232649
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30708) - you deserved it (3599)

On 12/17/2010 at 4:48am - health - by dmsmcd (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was arrested for DWI in my own apartment complex. I had to be released into the custody of a sober adult, but I wasn't allowed access to my phone to get any numbers. I only have a few memorized. So I was picked up from jail by my ex-girlfriend and her fiancé - my manager at work. FML

#8733568
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18716) - you deserved it (15909)

On 02/28/2010 at 10:46pm - misc - by Ben - United States (Wisconsin)



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