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Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML

#16460145
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27288) - you deserved it (2500)

On 06/01/2011 at 10:48pm - work - by evomadrid24 - United States (Arizona)

Today, while in heavy traffic on the highway, a motorcyclist managed to t-bone my car. He picked himself up, glanced at the side of my car, and quickly drove off, all in the space of a few seconds. I just got an expensive paint job on this thing. FML

#17778728
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21705) - you deserved it (2588)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, while driving, I slowed down and made sure I safely went by a pedestrian, and in the process rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

#19133346
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7631) - you deserved it (18345)

On 02/21/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by me (man) - United States

Today, I was holding my baby daughter during a checkup. To reassure her, I was kissing the back of her head while the Dr. was checking her hearing. After a few minutes, I realized the Dr. had put his hand to steady her head. I was kissing his hand. FML

#4210609
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36819) - you deserved it (20973)

On 08/01/2009 at 5:37pm - misc - by smoochie -

Today, after handing out several résumés for several jobs, I realized that I forgot to add my phone number to them. FML

#19188907
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9673) - you deserved it (28528)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:21pm - work - by tammylauraine - United States

Today, I paid £140 for a train ticket. All the seats were full. When I sat in the corridor the guard yelled at me. I paid £140 to stand outside a stinking train toilet for 7 hours. FML

#15858799
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27681) - you deserved it (2906)

On 04/20/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Sivvus (woman) - Reserved

Today, I got a mass text message from a friend saying she's sorry she can't meet up with our group of friends for drinks because she's busy tonight. This is the first I've heard of any bar-crawling. FML

#17577753
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22382) - you deserved it (2151)

On 08/25/2011 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, the heat rash that has been devouring my side for the last week was revealed to be something much worse: shingles. FML

#17300096
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30399) - you deserved it (2714)

On 07/29/2011 at 5:40pm - health - by ivannooze - United States

Today, I tried a self-tanner in an attempt to rid myself of my ghost-white legs. I got my wish, but instead of a warm golden tan, I have red, swollen, lobster-like marks sticking out from the bottom half of my torso. FML

#18757985
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9648) - you deserved it (21161)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:48pm - health - by owwwwwe - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I needed to buy a new crash-helmet. I went to the motorbike shop and saw one I liked the look of. It was a bit of a tight fit, and I got my head stuck in it. I had to get the guy behind the counter to help me pull it off. My ears are still numb. FML

#18028228
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18605) - you deserved it (8300)

On 10/20/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Helmet (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML

#19787882
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20734) - you deserved it (2377)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:40pm - misc - by eeeee (woman) - United States

Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML

#19627607
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20981) - you deserved it (2849)

On 05/15/2012 at 3:27pm - health - by rhya4n (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I had my back waxed to deal with the uncontrollable hair growth. Afterwards, I broke out in numerous pimples where the hair used to be. Basically, a lose-lose situation. FML

#17308613
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26650) - you deserved it (3392)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:01pm - misc - by Mitcha857 - United States (Wisconsin)



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