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Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and "they're". This is the same child I've been spending thousands of dollars on to send to law school. FML

#21072333
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43981) - you deserved it (6142)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was helping my wife bring in the groceries. She was able to carry 4 bags and a jug of milk. I was struggling with 2 bags. FML

#21069230
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36043) - you deserved it (21640)

On 02/23/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by weak - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

#21119972
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40056) - you deserved it (5087)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a restaurant with my friend, where my credit card got denied in front of everyone. The staff teased me and made me sit in the restaurant while my friend begged for money outside. FML

#21138924
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46173) - you deserved it (8010)

On 05/13/2014 at 6:37pm - money - by Harry (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my neighbor collects body-bags. FML

#21139874
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42902) - you deserved it (3791)

On 05/14/2014 at 5:46pm - misc - by chellegbelle - United States (Washington)

Today, at my job at a frozen yogurt shop, an elderly woman gladly announced that I'd be seeing a lot of her due to the vaginal infection that she has. Thank you for that, ma'am. FML

#21203678
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44751) - you deserved it (4077)

On 07/09/2014 at 3:26am - health - by Sun_Kissed18 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while working as a teacher at a daycare, a two year-old girl decided the best way to share that she had pooped was to reach in her diaper and attempt to hand some to me. FML

#21264874
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33627) - you deserved it (3309)

On 09/25/2014 at 12:03am - kids - by disgusted - United States (Maine)

Today, I told my mom that once I leave school, I want to join the clergy, and how much it meant to me. Her response: "Never knew you wanted to molest kids so much!" FML

#21270314
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32911) - you deserved it (7135)

On 10/03/2014 at 9:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML

#21297627
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32064) - you deserved it (9143)

On 11/12/2014 at 11:00am - health - by juggalomurderer59 (man) - United States

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32707) - you deserved it (9849)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, I found out how whipped I am when, at the climax of sex, I moaned, "I'm sorry!" FML

#21337152
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31387) - you deserved it (7434)

On 01/14/2015 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by imsorry (man) - United States (California)

Today, what my friends call my "resting bitch face" freaked my boyfriend out enough during sex that he went soft inside me. FML

#21374265
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33397) - you deserved it (7893)

On 03/14/2015 at 4:22am - intimacy - by sa la vash (woman) - Netherlands



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