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Today, I helped an elderly lady unscrew the cooling tank's cap from her smoking car. My reward? A scalding shower of toxic, pungent antifreeze that erupted moments after removing said cap. She didn't even thank me. FML

#16995369
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24264) - you deserved it (16926)

On 07/06/2011 at 1:27am - misc - by thoughtcrimeno1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

#19276997
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22111) - you deserved it (3538)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:19am - money - by me - United States (Florida)

Today, I was pitching at a fastpitch softball game. The other team chanted about the ball being too high and almost hitting the batter in the eye. After throwing the next pitch, the ball was savagely returned by the batter, straight into my eyes. FML

#20009467
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20542) - you deserved it (2532)

On 08/08/2012 at 12:00pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

#19508407
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22248) - you deserved it (2195)

On 04/21/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I planned to go on a date with a man I met online. He came to my apartment to pick me up, and I told him I'd be right out as I grabbed my purse. When I got outside, he was gone. FML

#19615076
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23367) - you deserved it (3886)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:06am - misc - by deewe (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the closest I got to a vacation was the smell of my new towels, because they remind me of a hotel. FML

#19481018
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17687) - you deserved it (2186)

On 04/16/2012 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML

#19835247
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9054) - you deserved it (27481)

On 06/23/2012 at 6:21pm - work - by XoXonedirectionXoXo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mobile phone wouldn't turn on. I took it in to the phone store, but they won't fix or replace it because the account is in my dad's name, not mine. He's abroad for the next month, and the only way to get a hold of him is on a number I only stored on my phone. FML

#19511679
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23379) - you deserved it (5347)

On 04/22/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by dontbuysamsung (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while working security at a welfare office, I had to listen as a claimant gushed about her upcoming Caribbean cruise. I work two jobs and haven't had a vacation since 2006. FML

#20092291
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25114) - you deserved it (1788)

On 09/28/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by getajob (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a cop turned his lights and siren on to pull me over. I pulled into a parking lot and got a ticket. It wasn't until the cop pulled away that I realized that I'd pulled into, and interrupted, an on-going funeral visitation. FML

#19847830
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21243) - you deserved it (4685)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking down the street, when I saw a guy in front of me trip and fall forwards, and I quickly jumped forward to steady him. Apparently he thought he was being mugged, and threw his head backwards into my face, leaving my nose a bloody mess. FML

#19793138
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21866) - you deserved it (2169)

On 06/15/2012 at 4:23pm - misc - by shalara (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

#20109013
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18593) - you deserved it (1739)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:07pm - work - by yolo is for shitheads - United States

Today, I found myself actively concerned about what the characters from "Will and Grace" have been doing since the show went off the air. FML

#20011081
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6487) - you deserved it (15371)

On 08/09/2012 at 6:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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