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Today, I found out just how much my dog likes ice-cream when she tackled a little girl at a park for hers. FML

Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML

#21399850
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34608) - you deserved it (3482)

On 04/26/2015 at 4:19am - love - by fuck you (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies all over her boobs. She said it wasn't cheating because she was doing God's work and that they canceled each other out. FML

#21432849
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32309) - you deserved it (2645)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:29pm - love - by isaidfuckoff (woman) - United States

Today, I waited 45 minutes at the Apple Store for my grandpa to very loudly ask why PornHub wasn't loading on his computer. FML

#21448024
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (2044)

On 07/27/2015 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML

#21455220
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33308) - you deserved it (2328)

On 08/12/2015 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went swimming. While I was walking along side of the pool, everyone was staring at me. I began to think that my diet was really working. It was only an hour later, in the changing rooms, that I noticed the string from my Tampax that was sticking out of my swimming costume. FML

#627
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24054) - you deserved it (5583)

On 12/30/2008 at 1:24am - misc - by mimimi - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had a dream that I was 25, unemployed, living with my parents, and still completely in love with someone who no longer feels the same way about me. Oh wait... it wasn't a dream. FML

#1809
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25413) - you deserved it (6470)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:23pm - misc - by HeadTrauma - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and said I was not 'Christian enough' for her. Later I found out she had been cheating on me with my best friend. FML

Today, I woke up very hung over after a big party last night. As I walked into my kitchen to make something to eat, I noticed a weird smell. Turns out my friend had thrown up in my freezer, and then turned off my whole fridge so "it wouldn't freeze and be hard for me to clean up in the morning." FML

Today, I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park and reclined my seat and shut my eyes. Soon I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car and I felt a little better for once. I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car. FML

#1935923
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38673) - you deserved it (3545)

On 05/14/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by overlandparkmommie (woman) - United States

Today, while deleting my ex-fiancée's account off my computer, I saved her pics. I found one of her with her now boyfriend in our bedroom. FML

#3712124
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59077) - you deserved it (4333)

On 07/13/2009 at 7:16am - intimacy - by RDMdragoon (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the coffee shop for my usual morning latte before class. When I got my drink, I asked again to make sure it was soy. The barista assured me it was. It wasn't. I'm ridiculously lactose intolerant and just spent six hours throwing up because she was too lazy to correct her mistake. FML

#5564287
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44352) - you deserved it (3683)

On 09/30/2009 at 11:12am - health - by sick (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

#4531515
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37702) - you deserved it (15522)

On 08/14/2009 at 6:28pm - money - by scfead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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