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Today, I found out that my booty call only likes to have sex with me so afterwards he can watch ESPN on my plasma screen TV, because he has neither. FML

#7009296
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8499) - you deserved it (12928)

On 12/29/2009 at 3:59am - intimacy - by pieceofcake163 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom informed me that my entire family puts their dirty towels on the towel rack in the bathroom instead of the hamper. I've been using their dirty towels after showers for as long as I remember. FML

#7108098
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22892) - you deserved it (5719)

On 01/02/2010 at 5:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting at the bar of a popular local restaurant. I sat there for a few hours and drank my sorrows away with the bartender. I thought she was pretty, and decided to give her a large tip. The tip sent me over my credit card limit, and the bartender is not single. FML

#7117686
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6518) - you deserved it (29578)

On 01/03/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by halien1982 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized I'd rather be constipated, sick, sit in long traffic lines and inadvertantly eat spoiled meat than spend another day at my shitty job. All things that happened to me today. FML

#8840296
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20046) - you deserved it (2406)

On 03/05/2010 at 3:01am - work - by Petergibbons - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my sister why it's unhygienic, socially unacceptable and downright inappropriate to apply Thrush ointment in the lounge room. I realised I wasn't getting through to her when she called me ''Uptight,'' ''Victorian" and ''prudish'' to name a few. FML

#9017056
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15988) - you deserved it (2500)

On 03/12/2010 at 3:26am - intimacy - by 1378 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML

#8557720
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24627) - you deserved it (3151)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:43pm - health - by baconrash - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the shower getting ready for a date, when my older sister thought it would be a laugh to turn out the light. Getting out of the shower to turn it back on, I slipped and hit on my head on the counter. Thanks, sis. FML

#8250617
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22125) - you deserved it (2645)

On 02/14/2010 at 2:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a romantic weekend away at a hotel. What is he doing now? On his computer looking up stuff on Craigslist while I am watching t.v. alone. FML

#8230215
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20264) - you deserved it (2885)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:03am - love - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I brought to her attention a rather large zit on the corner of her mouth. She called me an insensitive prick. I only pointed it out because I didn't want other people to see it and make fun of her. FML

#8624928
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20990) - you deserved it (18439)

On 02/24/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by pickit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had pancakes for breakfast, and without realizing it, I got syrup in my hair. After breakfast, I went to straighten my hair, only to burn the syrup and have it get stuck in my hair. There was no time to shower and it smelled. FML

#8716792
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10241) - you deserved it (20020)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:10pm - misc - by maddy - United States (Washington)

Today, my dorm had a mandatory meeting about body image. I went to the meeting and left feeling all good about myself. As soon as I got back to my room, my favorite jeans ripped right across my butt. FML

#8859688
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18872) - you deserved it (4178)

On 03/06/2010 at 12:14am - misc - by shortiem (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer away with my tray at Chick-fil-A. FML

#12149322
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12962) - you deserved it (26282)

On 07/27/2010 at 6:15pm - money - by idgit42 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got in an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

#13153251
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24945) - you deserved it (3841)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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