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Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML

#15493729
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27607) - you deserved it (6669)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:32am - misc - by Broderick (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML

#17878442
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20559) - you deserved it (8551)

On 10/01/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by soapy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

#19596510
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20169) - you deserved it (5195)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:19am - health - by Slowsky (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got fired from a job that I've had for four days for being too "secretive." Apparently, I was leaning over my notebook so that my boss couldn't stand behind me and read what I was writing. The email literally said I was "being too sneaky". They were work notes. FML

#20132367
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21558) - you deserved it (1670)

On 10/25/2012 at 2:59am - work - by TheHarvardian (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, for the first time in a week, a customer entered my store. He needed to use the bathroom. FML

#20073639
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24950) - you deserved it (2186)

On 09/15/2012 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to college on bike through snow and hail only to find out my professor can't make it to class due to the weather. She lives down my street. FML

#20495386
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (2959)

On 02/06/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by refticon (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML

#20467750
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28588) - you deserved it (16271)

On 01/19/2013 at 11:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML

#20752773
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35881) - you deserved it (5138)

On 06/28/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Jordan (Al Balqa')

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

#20829508
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44834) - you deserved it (7068)

On 08/09/2013 at 6:17pm - work - by fired (man) -

Today, I accidentally ran a stop sign. It wouldn't have been so bad if the stop sign hadn't been in a traffic cop's hands. FML

#20836993
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22283) - you deserved it (44669)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, it was my birthday. I spent all day in bed, sick with the flu. My boyfriend then broke up with me by text, because he didn't want to risk getting sick by doing it in person. FML

#20838443
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53067) - you deserved it (3206)

On 08/15/2013 at 7:28am - love - by Rachel8896 - United States (Washington)

Today, the boy who loved me and left me literally became the poster boy for my college. His picture is on the home page of the college website and on a banner in the cafeteria where I eat every day. FML

#20893327
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40274) - you deserved it (3073)

On 09/23/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by justonce (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got paired up with a coworker for a three-month project. All he talks about is how attractive my girlfriend is and what he would do with her. FML

#20901560
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46034) - you deserved it (3468)

On 09/30/2013 at 2:02am - work - by 3 More Months (man) - United States (California)



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