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Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I decide to take a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted rotten chicken. Turns out my grandma knew I drink her soy milk and decided to swap it with expired chicken broth. FML

#6689235
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9929) - you deserved it (40290)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:41am - work - by souped (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my ex looked at me for the first time in months. I felt like I could fly. Seconds later my flight ended. I fell down the stairs. FML

#7164896
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23479) - you deserved it (12157)

On 01/05/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by katiekat (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, someone was getting beat up by 6 guys. When I tried to help, they had a swing at me as well. The cops came when I was enthusiastically defending myself. They got away, I got arrested. FML

#13762252
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35864) - you deserved it (3954)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:48am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I was unsuccessful at a job interview, and she didn't want to be with someone who "has no future". She's unemployed too. FML

#13167469
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35186) - you deserved it (3901)

On 09/23/2010 at 7:18am - love - by man2 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML

#14200955
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7688) - you deserved it (35730)

On 12/14/2010 at 10:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my varsity swim team got second place in the State meet. My coach said I could bring the trophy home for the weekend. On the way home, I accidentally sat on it and broke it, cutting my butt. FML

#13319257
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10536) - you deserved it (34443)

On 10/04/2010 at 6:11pm - misc - by kat101 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my fencing team took pictures for the yearbook. We were having individual pictures with our weapons, and it was my turn. When the photographer told me to pose, I tried to be super cool by quickly putting my sabre against my chest like some sort of soldier. I poked myself in the eye. FML

#14051291
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7921) - you deserved it (34247)

On 12/01/2010 at 7:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while in my drama class, my character in a play has to quickly jump up out from his desk. Somehow, my shirt got caught on the desk, ripping it almost completely off in front of a live audience. FML

#13810188
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26685) - you deserved it (3050)

On 11/12/2010 at 12:41am - misc - by me - United States

Today, I began training my replacement at work. She's a senior citizen. She got excited when I taught her how to highlight text on the screen and double-click the mouse because she "never knew how to do those fancy tricks." The job is entirely computer-based. I have to train her for 6 weeks. FML

#13869223
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28839) - you deserved it (2596)

On 11/16/2010 at 8:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I decided to wax my own eyebrows with a Do It Yourself kit from the pharmacy. I'm now missing half of my right eyebrow. FML

#12736614
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (40481)

On 08/25/2010 at 9:10am - misc - by Eyebrowsgone - United States (California)

Today, I finally found the words to describe how I felt after 2 years of depression. I asked on Yahoo Answers what I should do next. The most 'helpful' answer told me to go on a picnic. FML

#14386162
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12574) - you deserved it (26642)

On 12/29/2010 at 8:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I popped a zit and I went to put my acne medicine on it. It's in a clear bottle with a blue cap, just like the nearby nailpolish remover. I grabbed the wrong one. FML

#12685763
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26878) - you deserved it (14040)

On 08/22/2010 at 5:20pm - misc - by inseriouspain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend thought he gave me unimaginable pleasure. I didn't have the heart to tell him I had cramp in both my legs at the same time. FML

#11236853
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35205) - you deserved it (7580)

On 06/16/2010 at 7:32am - intimacy - by kitkat1603 (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)



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