Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was driving back from school 100 miles away from my home with my fiancé and dog. While stopping for gas, we accidentally left our car keys and cell phones in the car. The dog sat on one of the keys and engaged the locks. We were locked out of the car until the tow truck arrived. FML

#14474591
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11613) - you deserved it (18078)

On 01/05/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I woke up at 3am to go to work. This will be my new routine from now on. FML

#14798010
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28476) - you deserved it (8960)

On 02/01/2011 at 3:14pm - work - by yawning - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML

#14459175
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18091) - you deserved it (5430)

On 01/04/2011 at 2:30am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up early to go to church with my parents. When I got in the car, I was struck with the worst diarrhea I've ever had in my life. My parents told me I'd be cleaning the car out when we got there, because if we turned around, we'd be late. FML

#14521261
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24240) - you deserved it (2709)

On 01/09/2011 at 2:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was posted with a very lonely gate-guard. From the second I arrived, I had to listen to him drone on and on, and now I know his entire life story. I was there for four hours. FML

#14932572
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17355) - you deserved it (3626)

On 02/11/2011 at 4:54am - work - by anonymous -

Today, I found out about my old school's class reunion, which I wasn't invited to. Everyone has my number and e-mail address. They just "forgot" to tell me. FML

#19448079
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19728) - you deserved it (2386)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Girl-with-the-glasses (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

#20086643
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23144) - you deserved it (3044)

On 09/24/2012 at 2:21pm - work - by izziegrl - Mexico (Mexico)

Today, I was babysitting for my usual. After putting the baby to sleep I put some popcorn in the microwave and went to the bathroom. When I came out the whole kitchen was filled with smoke. One of the neighbors saw and called 911. I'm out of a job. FML

#15214579
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10648) - you deserved it (30189)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:18am - work - by Dx - United States (California)

Today, I bought an otter box. While setting up my iPhone, I dropped it and it is now shattered. FML

#16944357
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (7617)

On 07/02/2011 at 1:50am - money - by hunter168647 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was scheduled for an interview at 3 o'clock. I allowed thirty minutes for the drive, but when I put my key in the ignition, the car wouldn't start. FML

#17017603
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25264) - you deserved it (3898)

On 07/07/2011 at 6:29pm - work - by Username - United States

Today, I had two of my wisdom teeth removed. One side of my face is completely swollen, and the other is normal. I feel like the elephant man. FML

#18528725
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17969) - you deserved it (3663)

On 12/16/2011 at 4:13pm - misc - by HR (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss contacted me to come in for a quick meeting. I drove 30 minutes to get to work only to find out she was firing me and wanted my key card back. FML

#16321332
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (2544)

On 05/23/2011 at 11:19pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while DJing at a jumpin' wedding reception, my speaker system conked out. I hadn't brought any backup equipment, and 500 guests had the unfortunate luxury of dancing to the sounds of a portable CD player someone brought in from their car. FML

#19255485
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8552) - you deserved it (25452)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:51am - misc - by Joey - Canada



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: